Tuesday, July 27, 2010

The dos and donts of The ex

There are some dos and donts when it comes to exes.

As for me, I don't think it's necessary for me to friend with my ex (this rules apply to scandals too). It's too complicated and I love to make my better half secure. I love my life to be simple, please don't judge me please.

I hate.. no.. let's make it.. I loathe people who say "I'm totally over my ex" and when the ex calls, face all bright up, if he/she was a star, it'd sure bright up the whole town. If they just ended up the relationship, it's still okay, but if after 2 years.. are you out of your mind?!

Though, I still have a lot of respect to those who can maintain close friends with their exes with no hanky panky or whatnot. That is very rare. But, some of my friends manage to do that. And since I have no idea how they could be damn professional about it, I really salute these people, they just.. mature..

Anyway, what I'm trying to say is that there are some dos and donts in a relationship and they VARY.

Some friends with the ex. Some just don't.

But I think there should be one thing that all of us should agree on..

NEVER TALK BAD ABOUT YOUR EX IN PUBLIC

Everyone has flaws. Both party must have a flaw, or else the relationship will work out, insya Allah. And yes, sometimes you gossip about your partner with your friend. But you don't talk bad about your ex in public. You don't abuse facebook to mock the person you once loved.

I sometimes wonder, how could you do that to someone you once loved. There could just be 2 reasons for me.

One, is that you think you really over your ex. But you are not. The fact that you are still talking about your ex in public means, you are not over him/her. If you are over your ex, you won't even know where he/she is right now. And which is why, I am not friend with my ex. For me, when it's over, it's over (but of course after a while)

Reason number 2, is that you want to show your ex that you win the break up, which also means you are not really over her. Why would you wanna impress her still? pfftt..

That is just my 2 cents.. :)

It's just.. u know disappointing to read someone writes nasty things about his ex when you think used to think highly of that someone.

And sucks to know that his ex is someone very dear to you.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Blink

I'm the type of person who take a look at something and instantly decide whether i like it or not.

When I was small I already knew that I wanted to be a teacher. As I got older wiser, I fell in love with Engineering, so now I'm doing both. Teaching Engineering. My life has always been that simple.

My husband loves shopping with me because I would go one round in the shopping mall, then I would say, "I wanna buy that purple shirt just now" or "Nothing nice. Let's just go home."

I don't do much thinking. Love in the other hand, he thinks TOO much. Here's one situation we had at this one particular restaurant..

Waiter: Soft drink or ice lemon tea?
Me (immediately): Ice lemon tea, please.
Waiter: You, Sir? (referring to Love)
Love: (Thinking for nearly a minute) Soft drink please.
Waiter: We have Coke, Sprite, bla.. bla..
Love: (Thinking as if it's the end of the world) Coke la coke. Eh.. wait, no we're boycotting the Jews. Urm.. 100 plus la 100 plus. TQ.
Waiter: Or we have also ice blended?
Love: Ice blended sounds nice!! Can i have Cappuccino please?
Waiter: We also have a new flavour, Sir. Would you like to try Mango?
Love: (Panicking, thinking for a minute more)

At this point, I just had to stop the waiter, "Next time, you should just introduce that new drink from the beginning. Sayang, you don't want to grow your hair grey just because of a drink.."

Love: Gosh! This is hard. Sayang pick one for me.
Me: Just pick whichever u like most. It's just a drink after all.
Love: Gosh I don't know I like them all!

UN. BE. LEIVE. A. BLE.

Even worse after what took like forever to decide on what to drink, when his drink arrived, it always has the worst taste. And I would make fun of him all the time. Because Love sometimes scolded me to think before I decide. He said I'm too lazy to think. But hey, at least if my drink tasted bad, I could just console myself telling it's ok, cuz I didn't stress out to pick which is best for me after all.

This situation happens over food. And over the largest think we bought. House, car, Gibson..

Of course, my judgement is not always right. Once, a new guy came to our school, and he looked so arrogant and he was in the same class as mine, I just hated him. The whole class knew how much I hate him. But, I ended up marrying him.

How did my judgement fail? How did that 2 seconds I used to analyze people did not work to my future husband?

I was not sure, I thought I should really stop judging people. And I did try. But after I finished reading this book yesterday, I knew why sometimes judgement fail.



The fact that, judging a person in 2 seconds without you really knowing that person is ridiculous. You have to spend a quality 2 seconds with that someone to really judge him. Because when I finally talked to 'Love' 10 years ago that I realized how different we were, and they say opposite attracts, so.. the rest is history.

This is one heck of an interesting book. Read it read it read it!!

Tuesday, July 20, 2010

Darling Myra's Pink and Brown Birthday Party

If you've followed my wedding blog previously, you probably know this sweetheart..


Myra!

We have been in the same uni (though different course) since I was in my foundation year. But we have only been close when I left uni. (I mean not really left this uni, cuz I studied in the same uni as I'm working currently, so practically we've been closed since I left undergrad years).

She actually organized her own grand birthday party at Haagen Dazs, Solaris where she sponsored the food and all, so sweet ryte?


The deco is just superb, look at this!!




The food? Yummy!! You can get sugar rush for this!!


The cake is so comel!!


The crowd is even more awesome.






Everything is great except the service at Haagen-Dazs. Dahla slow, even more you give her..




A real knife to cut her cake! how could u do that to such gorgeous princess!!

And she even provide us with door gifts that I haven't yet eat because...


I don't have the heart to eat her face. I love her too much.


And what do you give to a princess who organize such beautiful party? Charles and Keith handbag, which btw, she received 2 on the day!!



To my dearest Myra, thanks for organising such beautiful event. I must thank also these brilliant masterminds esp NadrahTheDreamer.


Myra, we ♥ you a LOT, you just know how much kan?

From,

Kaps and Iks (ok, 'Iks' sounds ugly, change back to Kaps and Ikeen)

Sunday, July 18, 2010

Fragile

The previous two weeks, we had a dinner at Nenek's house. One of her maid went back to Indonesia for a break, and we received a call from Indonesia that night telling that the maid was warded in the hospital due to some complications in her stomache. She was so well last time we met her.

Then last Tuesday, Nenek's cat was warded in the hospital, and I'm not sure what caused it but man, she is really REALLY old.

Wednesday night, Nenek was warded. We came to visit her on Thursday and the moment we arrived, people in the ward were telling jokes about Nenek's driver.

And suddenly on Saturday, Nenek's driver had a heart attack and the doctor had to put him in a deep sleep for a while.

So, it was not a good day for Nenek feeling like she had it all the week before.. and now, everyone she spends time with everyday seems so far away from her. And now, Nenek is still in the hospital, maid is still in the hospital, cat is still in the hospital, driver is still in comma. :(

It's a really rare case that is happening to us currently, having this kind of thing happening one after another.

But i believe, He has a greater plan for Nenek and us.

As for now, it got me thinking, how fragile our life is, and how funny to only think about it after all these are happening to us. I believe this is a reminder from the Almighty, and as I have been reminded I am happy to know that I am still loved :)

Let us all pray for them.

Friday, July 9, 2010

Ikeen Pausch?

Once, I did my regular shopping at MPH and I looked at a new arrival book that straight away caught my eyes..



THE LAST LECTURE by RANDY PAUSCH.

But at that particular time, I already bought another book, so sadly, I told myself, "Next month I'm going to buy this book!"

I just kept it to myself. The following month was my birthday, and surprisingly BFF Qdin bought me that particular book for my birthday!!! Boy, was I glad!

And ever since then, I've this dream of becoming a motivational speaker.

Last week I had that chance, when I was given the opportunity to talk about Studying in Uniten to the new students in my department.


It was funny, really. Not that I was a really good student back in my undergraduate years.

Those who knew me back then know how often I skipped class or how late I was or how sometimes I took a peek at someone's assignment. And, those moments were the moments that I was not proud of at all. Because the earth is round. Whatever you're doing to others will always come back to haunt you. And that was the main topic of my talk the other day.

But i beleive that everything happens for a reason. You must be in their shoes to really know what they're doing.

REminds me of one time at the exam hall when I was invigilating for final exam, a colleague of mine asked (in amazement), "How come you are always the one that can caught students cheating?"

Yes, beleive me or not, I caught students who cheat in exam all the time. I seriously mean, ALL THE TIME.

And how do you answer to that kind of questions?

How do you react to it? Proud? Ashamed?

I seriously don't know ;p

Thursday, July 8, 2010

Fight for your love

You know that song by Cheryl Cole "Fight for this love", that part..

"We gotta fight, fight, fight, fight, fight for this love" (Repeats three annoying times with voice that is too high to reach the low note)

Don't get me wrong. I love her. She's so smoking hot and the song is good, i mean, her voice is good also, just maybe not for that type of song.




Well, anyway, i'm not here to talk about her.

As most of you already know by now, I've been together with Love for almost 9 years now. From high school, now we're married. And people would say, "Owhh.. they are so lucky, they found each other that early."

But did we know for sure that we would marry each other a couple of years ago? No.

Things were rough for us. We didn't have it easy.

Sometimes, we took each other for granted. At times I was too obsessed with work that I chose to ignore him. Other times he was too obsessed with well, hot stuff like Cheryl Cole.

You know, when everything screws up, you can either do two things:
1. Tell yourself that he's not the one. Blame it on him. Or blame it on the timing. It's your choice.
2. Give it a time and hold on to it for a while.

If you choose number 1, that's the end of it.

If you choose number 2, you have to set your boundaries. How long you have to hold on, and when to let go. You have to know when to let go. If you hold on, and he comes back to you, expect that everything will change. You've to change, he has to change, or else, wait for it coming back 2 years from now.

I got so touchy when it comes to breaking up. Because I've been there and it hurts like hell.

But what i learned from every break up is that it happens for a very good purpose in the end. Or else I wouldn't be happily married with the love of my life.

"Anything that's worth having
Is sure enough worth fighting for
Quitting's out of the question
When it gets tough, gotta fight some more."

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Lost

I remember the time when I was in form 4, and I was among the last person in my class who got a handphone.

Still, life was splendid! Was already with Love back then, and was busy travelling around the world with my family cuz Form 4 is a honeymoon year, ryte? We still contacted each other through phone everyday, cuz man, payphone is everywhere.

Then, Dad decided to give me my first ever hp, a bulky 3315 Nokia. Life was so much easier then. No more queuing for payphone to call my Mum to fetch me up. Still it sometimes annoy me that I had to carry it everywhere or else Mum will freak out if I didn't pick up my phone.


From here

About 3 months after that, my phone bills got so worse that Dad decided to take back my hp for a while.

That was when I couldn't even remember how i survived without a hp before. When I was in Penang for a holiday trip, I couldn't even find a payphone there. Which I suspected I was too used of having a hp that my sense to look for a payphone was not as good as before. :(

Anyway, I got back my hp after a week and I lived happily ever after. End of story.

But yesterday, I encountered some similar situation.

I was so used of having the room by my own before I got married. I enjoyed my way-too-big-queen-size bed all by myself.

Then I got married, and I shared almost everything with Love. And I need some time to adjust.

But when I went back late from work yesterday, knowing that Love would not be there in my room last nite, it just feels..

Incomplete.

And I don't like it at all.

I don't like the situation. And I feel disgusted with myself.