Sunday, September 22, 2013

Seminar Fiqh - Ibu Bapa Mithali - A review: Part 1

Ever since I went to hypnobirthing class in 2011, I set in my mind to go to other classes at least once every year. Kaizen, as what the Japanese said, it means 'continuous learning'.

So, last year I went to Darwish Darwisya seminar. This year, I was hoping to enroll to the advance class, but so far, this year, they didn't open any yet. :(

Recently, BFF Sumayyah whatsapped us this pic..

Somehow, I was immediately hooked. I enrolled Love and I for the seminar, and to cut the story short, here I am, blogging about it to share with all of you with my cliche "Sharing is caring".

The fee is RM 120 per person; which was worth it. Start at 8am to 10pm (yep, you read that right!). The fee includes breakfast, lunch, tea, dinner, so many free gifts consist of books and magazines and most importantly five amazing speakers which I will share the content of each speaker in each entry. 

Unfortunately, I can only have four entries, as I was not there for one of the speakers, simply because both Love and I could not relate to her. Also, because we haven't visited Nenek this month. (It has been 5 months and we miss her a lot, Al Fatihah..)

The venue of the event is at multi purpose hall in Menara TM. The hall was so-so, quite inconvenient to write anything actually since it has only simple chairs. But the facilities were convenient. The surau, the toilet, the nursery for parents who needed someone to take care of their children while attending the talk.

Picture above taken in Aussie, below from tempat wudhu' in TM. Way to go Malaysia!! I'm forever proud of u!

Which reminds me, I must thank my mom for taking care of my little ones and Love for being there with me although I know it's not his thing and he definitely needed his rest after his hectic week at work and his exam. Alhamdulillah, I must be blessed.

So let me share with you the content of the first speaker..

Ustaz Pahrol Juoi: Tanggungjawab Hakiki Ibu Bapa

This is actually the third time I went to his talk about parenting. I haven't found time to blog about the previous two; so I guess I'm gonna summarize all three talks here.

The gist of his talk is actually on the greatest cycle of the family.

Allah {-- Father {-- Mother {-- Children

Father is the leader in the family. Their task is to lead. They are the ones that determine the direction of the family. They must act as the hero for their children. They need to be scared and loved at the same time. 

Mother's task is to manage the family to get into the directions determined by the father. We, mothers need to bring the husband to another level, so our children will respect them. And our task is just to love, not to scare the children, that is the father's task.

And both mother and father need to ensure that the children love Allah SWT and Rasullulah SAW. Introduce them in their daily life.

Also, the most important thing in family is actually TRUST. Then, only comes love. I guess it's true. Once Mom told my Dad something I asked her not to, and when I found out about it, I haven't told my Mom anything important in my life for years. We must make the children trust in us, and so does the husband.

Ustaz also shared about the 7+7+7 concept, which I think we are familiar about it by now. I guess this picture summarizes it all..

Other than that, Ustaz said we must not pamper the children too much. Let them eat plain rice rice sometimes without any other dishes. Yang ni mestilah I don't have the heart to do so. :( Or let them sleep without mattress. And give them only the things they want; if we give them everything, we're spoiling them.

Also, he suggested to have an area in our home with books. That has been long taken care of since I'm a total bookworm.

But above all, one thing I learned the most in his talk is to take care of these three things with our children; their eat time, sleep time, and solat time. When we take care of these three, in shaa Allah, the rest are taking care of.

I think it is very true. My mom's OCD in timing, masya Allah.. it's killing me sometimes. It's time to mandi, time to makan, time to wake up, I'd be like, "Relax mom, it's weekend, biarlah Khaira bangun lambat sikit.."

But I guess if not because of her OCD, I wouldn't know how to manage my time as well as I am now; juggling PhD (no more, Alhamdulillah), mommy, employee, wife, and daughter at the same time.

It's funny what little things stick in our mind the most. I hope if you have a chance to go to his talk, go! Perhaps some things I did not share (cuz I think it's too small for me) might mean the world for you. :)

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