Wednesday, July 27, 2016

How He reminds me: My aftermath umrah story

Right after I arrived in Malaysia from Makkah, I missed the holy land so badly, I cried sometimes so horribly I almost couldn't breathe one time.

Then a month after, I received somewhat like an offer as a postdoc in a university in Jeddah, an hour away from Makkah, in an exact field I'm majoring right now, with triple the pay than what I received in my current university.

Was I excited? Not a word could describe it, and my supportive husband willing to let go his current job.

But, looking at my parents, I didn't have the heart. I came from a very conservative family in that sense, my mom never left us anywhere overnight. When I stayed in uni, my parents called me every night, seriously I promise, every night. And none of us have ever been away to boarding school or anything.

I couldn't imagine them being away from my girls.

Then, my husband got promoted and that was it. I knew I had to let it go, although husband insisted. He is at the peak of his career, and after all the provider of the family, thinking of prioritizing mine over him just kills me inside.

"Let's go again end of this year!" Love suggested, without the kids this time around.

Not now. Not when Aisha is still cranky having to sleep without me. Recently, I had to work outstation and she slept at 2am after crying inconsolably, poor mom.

Where my heart belongs :)

When I missed Makkah, I looked at the images in Google Map. The drone and 360 images help a lot.

A couple of days ago, I received a message.

An invitation.

To that particular university, may I remind you just an hour away from Masjidil Haraam.

On October, right after Hajj where you can only enter Makkah by invitation during that time. Imagine how empty Masjidil Haraam would be, not empty but you know what I mean..

Anddddd... the best part, I would be given business visa + umrah.

"Can I bring my spouse?" Was my first question. No need to think, this is Almighty's invitation ro me.

"No, because this is by invitation," was the reply I got. Sure would shatter by hub's heart, but I still want to go.

"How about my mahram, then?" I asked. "For umrah, how about my mahram?"

Anddddd... stuck. Now, I'm stuck with the mahram issue. Make lots of doa if this is meant for me, Allah swt would make everything easy for me.

Even if it's not meant for me this time around, He constantly reminds me of Makkah, masha Allah terharunya. *cries*

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