My scribbles from a talk I attended earlier:
Al Wahan = cinta dunia
Lima musuh orang mukmin:
1. Orang mukmin yang hasad dengki
2. Orang kafir yang memeranginya
3. Munafik yang memarahinya
4. Syaitan yang menyesatkannya
5. Nafsu yang mengajak kejahatan
"And the worldly life is not but amusement and diversion; but the home of the Hereafter is best for those who fear Allah, so will you not reason?" - Surah Al An'am verse 32
Minta 'afiat --> Maksudnya kalau sihat, sihat dan taat.
Dunia tempat berpenat, akhirat tempat berehat.
Orang yang paling ingat mati, kualiti kerjanya paling baik. Tingkat produktiviti untuk Allah swt.
One way ticket, macam nak pergi oversea. What food to bring, baju, rumah di syurga. Excited nak pergi syurga.
Hati bila nak solat = hati nak jumpa Allah swt.
Allah swt suka pakaian kemas, asal niat kerana Allah, bukan untuk riak.
Bukan seimbang, tapi integrated. Bukan 50 dunia, 50 akhirat. Tapi, kerja dapat gaji, dapat pahala --> integrated. Every action; mesti relate to akhirat.
Contoh:
1. menguap --> tabii untuk masuk oksigen dalam badan bila mengantuk --> wajib menguap kalau tak menguap boleh pengsan sebab tak cukup oksigen.
2. Tapi kalau menguap sebab nak sakitkan hati --> haram
3. Menguap baca Astaghfirullah --> sunat
4. Menguap besar sampai anak tekak --> makhruh
5. Menguap bersahaja --> harus
Showing posts with label Stories of Islamic Parenting. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Stories of Islamic Parenting. Show all posts
Friday, September 28, 2018
Friday, June 30, 2017
Aidilfitri 2017
As salam everyone,
Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri!!! Please please please forgive me for all the wrong doings, I pray may Allah accept all our deeds during Ramadhan and may He grant us all jannah.
Ramadhan this year has been the most meaningful for me so far.
Prior to Ramadhan, I have attended a talk in my office by Ustaz Pahrol Joui "Andainya Ini Ramadhan Terakhirku". I included the notes I took from the talk at the end of my entry. Simply said, it was a wake up call for me. I wanted to make my Ramadhan this time around more meaningful than the previous ones.
I had a bumpy start but by Day 5, I started to have my Ramadhan routine.
I want to have something that I continuously carry with me after this Ramadhan, and for this year, I wish to start Solat Witir even after Ramadhan. It's day 6 Syawal aandddd I failed miserably. Am totally not happy with that. May Allah swt grant me strength.
This Ramadhan, I felt the bliss of going to Surau for Tarawikh and so happy to listen to the interesting short tazkirah in between. And I learned something new this year..
I always read a saying, "Laylatul Qadr lebih baik dari 1000 bulan".
All these years, I thought "bulan" refers to moon, assuming it meant that during Laylatul Qadr, it shines so brightly better than 1000 moons.
Only this Ramadhan, I know that "bulan" refers to "month". Laylatul Qadr is better than 1000 months, meaning your good deeds in that night is equivalent to doing good deeds for 83 years!! Oh my, the ignorance.. (T_T)
See, I have been so ignorant all my life. Khaira and Aisha Asyikin, if you're reading this one day, I pray everyday that you will be better than me in every way, my love.
Oh, don't forget to puasa 6 everyoneee!! I pray this year, for the first time in my life, I will be given the opportunity to complete my Puasa 6.
...
As promised, the notes I took during Ustaz Pahrol Joui's talk. Kalau ada silap, mohon maafkan dan betulkan. Saya budak baru belajar.
3 jenis puasa:
1. Puasa awam: puasa jaga benda2 yg batalkan puasa sahaja
2. Puasa khusus: puasa jaga benda2 batalkan dan seluruh pancaindera dari buat dosa
3. Puasa muqorrabin: puasa jaga benda2 batalkan, pancaindera dan jaga hati dan fikiran dari buat dosa. Ingat Allah all the time, kalau sesaat tak ingat Allah rasa berdosa
Amalan wajib digandakan 70x, amalan sunat sama pahala dgn wajib
Rukun islam = proses. Cth: Bila kita ada iman, kita puasa. Kalau puasa kita elok, output ialah kita jadi org bertaqwa. Kalau tak jadi orang bertaqwa, improve our process; ie. puasa
How to increase iman so that puasa elok:
A) Input=niat
1. Niat kerana Allah swt; bukan ekonomi/kesihatan/hikmah/nak kurus etc
2. Didik anak kerana Allah; bukan kerana adat. Contoh: Solat raya penuh masjid, tapi solat subuh? Subuh jemaah dgn tarawikh?
3. Mcm mat saleh masuk masjid, bila keluar tak tutup aurat balik. Mcm tu juga kita tinggalkn ramadhan, dah boleh baca quran setiap kali lepas solat masa ramadhan, tinggalkan pula lepas ramadhan
4. Serahkan diri pada Allah, serahkan kekuatan kita untuk puasa pada Allah
5. Once umur 40 tahun tapi tak jaga rawatib, something is wrong with us
6. Bangun sahur istighfar, masa sahur paling mudah nak dapat keampunan
B) Proses = pohon
1. Siam (menahan)
2. Qiam (membangun)
-jaga solat subuh dan isyak berjemaah, seolah bersolat sepanjang malam
-jaga tahajud, taubat, hajat, witir
-ibadat sehingga letih nak buat maksiat
3. Quran
-semua ahli keluarga mesti ada 1 Quran hardcopy
4. Sedeqah
-sedekah menajamkan doa
C) Output = taqwa
1. Banyak kemenangan fizikal dlm bulan ramadhan (badar, khandaq). Sbb bila bertaqwa
2. Berjaya atau tak puasa kita? Surah al imran 134
- nafkah harta masa susah atau senang
- tahan marah
- Maafkan salah
- Bila dosa cepat taubat
Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitri!!! Please please please forgive me for all the wrong doings, I pray may Allah accept all our deeds during Ramadhan and may He grant us all jannah.
Ramadhan this year has been the most meaningful for me so far.
Prior to Ramadhan, I have attended a talk in my office by Ustaz Pahrol Joui "Andainya Ini Ramadhan Terakhirku". I included the notes I took from the talk at the end of my entry. Simply said, it was a wake up call for me. I wanted to make my Ramadhan this time around more meaningful than the previous ones.
I had a bumpy start but by Day 5, I started to have my Ramadhan routine.
I want to have something that I continuously carry with me after this Ramadhan, and for this year, I wish to start Solat Witir even after Ramadhan. It's day 6 Syawal aandddd I failed miserably. Am totally not happy with that. May Allah swt grant me strength.
This Ramadhan, I felt the bliss of going to Surau for Tarawikh and so happy to listen to the interesting short tazkirah in between. And I learned something new this year..
I always read a saying, "Laylatul Qadr lebih baik dari 1000 bulan".
All these years, I thought "bulan" refers to moon, assuming it meant that during Laylatul Qadr, it shines so brightly better than 1000 moons.
Only this Ramadhan, I know that "bulan" refers to "month". Laylatul Qadr is better than 1000 months, meaning your good deeds in that night is equivalent to doing good deeds for 83 years!! Oh my, the ignorance.. (T_T)
See, I have been so ignorant all my life. Khaira and Aisha Asyikin, if you're reading this one day, I pray everyday that you will be better than me in every way, my love.
Oh, don't forget to puasa 6 everyoneee!! I pray this year, for the first time in my life, I will be given the opportunity to complete my Puasa 6.
...
As promised, the notes I took during Ustaz Pahrol Joui's talk. Kalau ada silap, mohon maafkan dan betulkan. Saya budak baru belajar.
3 jenis puasa:
1. Puasa awam: puasa jaga benda2 yg batalkan puasa sahaja
2. Puasa khusus: puasa jaga benda2 batalkan dan seluruh pancaindera dari buat dosa
3. Puasa muqorrabin: puasa jaga benda2 batalkan, pancaindera dan jaga hati dan fikiran dari buat dosa. Ingat Allah all the time, kalau sesaat tak ingat Allah rasa berdosa
Amalan wajib digandakan 70x, amalan sunat sama pahala dgn wajib
Rukun islam = proses. Cth: Bila kita ada iman, kita puasa. Kalau puasa kita elok, output ialah kita jadi org bertaqwa. Kalau tak jadi orang bertaqwa, improve our process; ie. puasa
How to increase iman so that puasa elok:
A) Input=niat
1. Niat kerana Allah swt; bukan ekonomi/kesihatan/hikmah/nak kurus etc
2. Didik anak kerana Allah; bukan kerana adat. Contoh: Solat raya penuh masjid, tapi solat subuh? Subuh jemaah dgn tarawikh?
3. Mcm mat saleh masuk masjid, bila keluar tak tutup aurat balik. Mcm tu juga kita tinggalkn ramadhan, dah boleh baca quran setiap kali lepas solat masa ramadhan, tinggalkan pula lepas ramadhan
4. Serahkan diri pada Allah, serahkan kekuatan kita untuk puasa pada Allah
5. Once umur 40 tahun tapi tak jaga rawatib, something is wrong with us
6. Bangun sahur istighfar, masa sahur paling mudah nak dapat keampunan
B) Proses = pohon
1. Siam (menahan)
2. Qiam (membangun)
-jaga solat subuh dan isyak berjemaah, seolah bersolat sepanjang malam
-jaga tahajud, taubat, hajat, witir
-ibadat sehingga letih nak buat maksiat
3. Quran
-semua ahli keluarga mesti ada 1 Quran hardcopy
4. Sedeqah
-sedekah menajamkan doa
C) Output = taqwa
1. Banyak kemenangan fizikal dlm bulan ramadhan (badar, khandaq). Sbb bila bertaqwa
2. Berjaya atau tak puasa kita? Surah al imran 134
- nafkah harta masa susah atau senang
- tahan marah
- Maafkan salah
- Bila dosa cepat taubat
Tuesday, August 9, 2016
Purification of the Heart: Important notes from Mufti Ismail Menk
I listened to this talk by Mufti Menk just now while doing my work, just thought of sharing what I managed to digest. Mufti Menk's speech is always very near to my heart, and this one brought me to tears this morning.
- Purification of the heart begins when you start to find out the words of Allah. Hence, try to understand the meaning of your solat or surahs
- When you see someone that is doing a sin, make a doa for him. Praying for somebody to be better will make yourself a better person as well. "Ya Allah, please grant this man hidayah, and grant me hidayah as well"
- Patience: If it takes you 40 years to discover your Creator, don't expect people to be better in 4 minutes
- When somebody advises you, don't think that they are judging you. "Judge" and "Advice" are two different things
- Don't give sedekah something that is haraam, eg. short dress.
- When you give someone something, you must know what it is.
- When you want to ask Allah SWT, ask for 1) Jannah 2) Purification of heart 3) Steadfast
- If you constantly repent, with the correct way, it will bring you to Allah swt and keep you away from sin. Eg. You istighfar always, then when you want to do sin, it will not go together.
- Sign that solah is done correctly: On time and worried about the next one. Sins will eradicate themselves.
- Things that avoid the purification of heart; 1) you do solat but you still do the sins such as pornography every night 2) Do sins when nobody is watching
- Solat/any ibadah without any other people knowing, purifies the heart. That is the link between you and Allah swt.
- Cry or even weep for repentance, that's the sign of purification of the heart
Power Parenting: Parenting Gaya Rasulullah - A review pt 5
PARENTING GAYA RASULULLAH
Fifth session: Ustazah Isfadiah
PENGASUHAN GAYA NABI
==================
nak jadi parent kena ada usaha utk jaga kesihatan diri
berusaha utk menjadi ibu yg baik.
kalau nak belajar dgn baik kena ajar diri sendiri.
Ustzh Isfadiah rapat dgn ayahnya.
Ustzh mengkaji santun cara nabi mendidik anak2.
Surah Ali Imran surah tema keluarga. watak imran tiada dlm surah tu. tp watak isteri imran diceritakan.
Surah luqman surah didikan anak2.
nabi yg cerita nya pasal anak2 sahaja iaitu nabi yaakub.
Allah tinggalkan byk model yg boleh dicontohi.
parent adalah satu jawatan tak boleh letak jawatan. jawatan seumur hidup.
Allah tak htr hanya AlQuran. tp hantar nabi utk demontrasi.
cara nabi adalah yg terbaik.
"Org yg paling baik antara kamu adalah org yg paling baik dgn ahli keluarganya.dan aku adalah terbaik dalam melayan ahli keluargaku."
Rasulullah adalah role model.
set minda anak.
skill bakat anak.
setiap hari 15 minit JOM AMAL refer buku 365 didik anak cara nabi.
buat bersama anak2.
#kupasan video
#video 1-kanak2 sekolah jepun.
disiplin dan peraturan.
sediakan peraturan dlm rumah dan syura dgn suami/isteri.
#video 2 - 911 nanny
pengawasan/kepekaan
contoh teladan
fokus
#video 3 - kanak2 hisap rokok 40 btg setiap hari sejak 18 bulan
galakkan
#video 4 - calo
u are here not to survive, u are here to fight
Power Parenting: Aplikasi NLP dalam Parenting - A review pt 4
APLIKASI NLP DALAM PARENTING
Fourth Session: Hj Fadzli Yusof
Anak satu pelaburan.
melabur skim cepat kaya. mula2 je happy lepas tu...down.
begitu juga dgn anak.
surah al-luqman
tanggungjwb parent kpd anak2.
ajarlah anak ketika umur 7 tahun. pukul 10 tahun.
tggjwb parent ajar selama 3 tahun 5 kali sehari solat. setahun 800x utk solat. 10800x selama 3 tahun suruh anak solat.
bersabar didik anak. bersabar didik anak.
www.facebook.com/fadzliyusofpage
15 denda tanpa memukul anak.
5 emosi utama seorg anak
1. INGIN DITERIMA
oleh 2 org yg paling penting dalam hidup dirinya ibu dan bapa.
#malangnya sekrg anak diterima oleh kawan2.
tunjukkan bahawa kita kena terima anak kita. buat setiap hari.
aksi yg kita tak diterima
1. marah
2. tak tengok dia cakap
3. bandingkan
4. bapak tak tegur anak sebulan kerana dpt 8A1B
#ignotic noman.
gelombang otak mudah diproses.
-waktu pagi tgh mamai
-waktu nak tidur tgh mamai.
-emosi intent. sgt happy. sgt sedih.
becareful semasa cakap anak dlm keadaan ignotic.
cth. time tu kita ckp kenapa degil sgt ni.
kalau kita tny pertanyaan di saat ignotic sgt bahaya.
cth. beli byk coklat. faizal jgn mkn lagi. lps lunch baru mkn.
lepas tu faizal curi mkn.
kenapa suka kacau adik. sbb hari2 kacau adik.
dah kantoi mughalazoh.
skrip yg betul
+faizal bdk yg baik. faizal buat mcm ni sbb faizal lapar ye. minta maaf dgn mak.
2. INGIN DICINTAI.
Kalau nak mak sayang dapatkan 5A.
kalau nak coki coki sayang mak dulu.
jgn perjudikan kasih sayang. Jangan sesekali kasih sayang dgn condition.
ramai rockers berhijrah adalah dr latar blkg keluarga yg saling menyayangi.
u must keep loving your kids uncondiotionally.
sesungguhnya Allah sungguh gembira kepada hambaNya yang bertaubat.
Allah sayang kita lebih dr kita sayang anak.
3. INGIN DIIKTIRAF
4. BERASA PENTING
say hi waktu bangun pagi.
berckp dgn org yg kita syg dlm keaddn phone dihdpn.
berckp dgn org yg syg smbil pegang phone.
berckp dgn org yg syg sambil memandang phone.
forget phabby(tak tahu ejaan)
limitkan masa kalau biz online
grp wassap tak urgent. anak adalah sosial urgent.
bila dgn anak avoid phone.
malam tak perlu updt fb. schedule kan time updt.
kalau nak buat mlm mintak kebenaran anak.
5. BERASA BERDIKARI
anak nak jd mcm dewasa.
tugas parent. anak spt deposit acc. acc. pelaburan perlu deposit setiap hari. ia satu portfolio pelaburan.
SENI MEMUJI ANAK
memuji dgn intensiti emosi yg tinggi.
sentiasa puji anak at least sehari sekali.
5 komponen pujian
1. sebutkan kebaikan yg dia lakukan. sama ada ia adalah USAHA ataupun HASIL.
kalau anak remaja.
kalau sebut nama agak kliase
cth anak 17 thn melukis dengan cantik.
puji cantiknya nurul meluks
pujian impaks wow! cantiklah lukisan ni.nurul ni mmg pandai melukislah. tasik tu mcm basah. pokok mcm hidup.
2. perincikan USAHA atau HASIL itu kpd 3 perincian.
3. nyatakan perasaan anda terhadap apa yg berlakukan.
mak bangga, I am proud with you.
4. puji diri anak dgn label yg baik.
kreatif. bijak.
5. masukkan aksesori pujian
awesome, terbaik, good job
Fourth Session: Hj Fadzli Yusof
Anak satu pelaburan.
melabur skim cepat kaya. mula2 je happy lepas tu...down.
begitu juga dgn anak.
surah al-luqman
tanggungjwb parent kpd anak2.
ajarlah anak ketika umur 7 tahun. pukul 10 tahun.
tggjwb parent ajar selama 3 tahun 5 kali sehari solat. setahun 800x utk solat. 10800x selama 3 tahun suruh anak solat.
bersabar didik anak. bersabar didik anak.
www.facebook.com/fadzliyusofpage
15 denda tanpa memukul anak.
5 emosi utama seorg anak
1. INGIN DITERIMA
oleh 2 org yg paling penting dalam hidup dirinya ibu dan bapa.
#malangnya sekrg anak diterima oleh kawan2.
tunjukkan bahawa kita kena terima anak kita. buat setiap hari.
aksi yg kita tak diterima
1. marah
2. tak tengok dia cakap
3. bandingkan
4. bapak tak tegur anak sebulan kerana dpt 8A1B
#ignotic noman.
gelombang otak mudah diproses.
-waktu pagi tgh mamai
-waktu nak tidur tgh mamai.
-emosi intent. sgt happy. sgt sedih.
becareful semasa cakap anak dlm keadaan ignotic.
cth. time tu kita ckp kenapa degil sgt ni.
kalau kita tny pertanyaan di saat ignotic sgt bahaya.
cth. beli byk coklat. faizal jgn mkn lagi. lps lunch baru mkn.
lepas tu faizal curi mkn.
kenapa suka kacau adik. sbb hari2 kacau adik.
dah kantoi mughalazoh.
skrip yg betul
+faizal bdk yg baik. faizal buat mcm ni sbb faizal lapar ye. minta maaf dgn mak.
2. INGIN DICINTAI.
Kalau nak mak sayang dapatkan 5A.
kalau nak coki coki sayang mak dulu.
jgn perjudikan kasih sayang. Jangan sesekali kasih sayang dgn condition.
ramai rockers berhijrah adalah dr latar blkg keluarga yg saling menyayangi.
u must keep loving your kids uncondiotionally.
sesungguhnya Allah sungguh gembira kepada hambaNya yang bertaubat.
Allah sayang kita lebih dr kita sayang anak.
3. INGIN DIIKTIRAF
4. BERASA PENTING
say hi waktu bangun pagi.
berckp dgn org yg kita syg dlm keaddn phone dihdpn.
berckp dgn org yg syg smbil pegang phone.
berckp dgn org yg syg sambil memandang phone.
forget phabby(tak tahu ejaan)
limitkan masa kalau biz online
grp wassap tak urgent. anak adalah sosial urgent.
bila dgn anak avoid phone.
malam tak perlu updt fb. schedule kan time updt.
kalau nak buat mlm mintak kebenaran anak.
5. BERASA BERDIKARI
anak nak jd mcm dewasa.
tugas parent. anak spt deposit acc. acc. pelaburan perlu deposit setiap hari. ia satu portfolio pelaburan.
SENI MEMUJI ANAK
memuji dgn intensiti emosi yg tinggi.
sentiasa puji anak at least sehari sekali.
5 komponen pujian
1. sebutkan kebaikan yg dia lakukan. sama ada ia adalah USAHA ataupun HASIL.
kalau anak remaja.
kalau sebut nama agak kliase
cth anak 17 thn melukis dengan cantik.
puji cantiknya nurul meluks
pujian impaks wow! cantiklah lukisan ni.nurul ni mmg pandai melukislah. tasik tu mcm basah. pokok mcm hidup.
2. perincikan USAHA atau HASIL itu kpd 3 perincian.
3. nyatakan perasaan anda terhadap apa yg berlakukan.
mak bangga, I am proud with you.
4. puji diri anak dgn label yg baik.
kreatif. bijak.
5. masukkan aksesori pujian
awesome, terbaik, good job
Power Parenting: Tip power parenting - A review pt 3
TIP POWER PARENTING
Third Session: Dr Tengku Asmadi
Education system di Malaysia tidak membongkar kemahiran anak-anak yg berbeza-beza.
cth : bila ada sebarisan haiwan monyet, gajah, ikan, anjing laut, penguin disuruh memanjat pokok. Dah tentu monyet tersengih lebar sbb mmg kemahiran dia memanjat. sedangkan haiwan lain tercengang je la dengan rasa kecewa.
- tengok kebolehan anak yang berbeza.
ASAS POWER PARENTING
💟agama
💟sahsiah
💟akademik
💟skil
💟AGAMA
Nak anak cemerlang
1. jaga waktu solat. solat awal waktu.
2. rajin baca al-quran.
-apabila anak rajin baca quran, anak jadi pintar.
-bila asas agama kukuh Insya Allah, rezeki murah.
Orang sekarang meminang tak tanya kerja apa. Mereka tanya boleh jd imam tak?
💟SAHSIAH
Sikap anak datang dari rumah
40% ibu bapa
60% guru, rakan, media
Jangan tonjolkan kelemahan kita depan anak.
cth: jgn kata negatif pun depan anak. spt merungut bila kita tak boleh buat sesuatu.
Hati2 apa kita buat. anak ikut.
Hati2 apa kita cakap. anak ikut.
Bila anak duduk sebelah kita. Dia tangkap/rekod apa yg dia nampak.
cth; bapa biasa suke ckp b*** bila sedang marah. terutamanya semasa memandu kereta bila ada kereta lain memotong. anak yang di sebelah tengok dan rekod. Itu yg dicakap nanti.
💟AKADEMIK
Hanya ada Akhlak baik, jujur, amanah tanpa ada ijazah boleh dapat kerja ke?
Boleh dengan berniaga.
Terima hakikat tak semua anak akademik ok.
Walaupun dia tak straight A di dunia, Insya Allah straight A di akhirat.
Jangan terlalu memaksa anak dapat A. sekadar kemampuan mereka.
💟SKILL
Orang ada skill boleh hidup.
Develop skill mereka spy mrk boleh cari rezeki.
cth tukang urut, goreng pisang, melukis, photographer.
Besarkan anak ikut zaman.
🚩Otak yg cerdik dlm usia 7 thn pertama. waktu ni beri pelbagai pendedahan.
🚩Perasaan ingin tahu anak-anak sangat kuat.
🚩Sekiranya dimarah bila mrk bertanya akan membantutkan perasaan ingin tahu mrk.
Statistik PDRM buat kajian anak yg lari dr rumah umur 15-19 thn.
sbb tu usia 8-14 ▶ kena tegas.
usia 15-19▶ jadikan mrk kawan. tegur cara baik.
💟BEBELAN POSITIF
▶berfikir dalam bentuk gambaran.
▶gambar bentuk tingkah laku.
Otak kita akan hasilkan apa yg kita gambarkan.
Perkataan 'JANGAN' tak tergambar dalam otak.
Otak tak boleh gambarkan perkataan 'JANGAN'
Otak percaya sekiranya dilakukan berulang2.
4 PERKARA PERLU PROGRAM OTAK
1. Cadangkan
2. Unik
3. Berulang2.
4. Emotionally strong.
cth. bayangkan sebakul durian.
cuba jangan bayangkan sebakul durian
▶tentu nak bayang jugakkan sebakul durian tu.
iklan di tv contohnya mmg gunakan 4 perkara di atas.
cth.
1. Aimankan anak mak yg pandai. betul ke pandai (not important)
2. Unik kan.
3. Ulang cakap
4. Emosi - Aimankan anak mak yg baik ( walau dlm keadaan marah)
Beza bebelan +ve dan -ve
Bebelan -ve (IBU A)
1. Abang kenapa bersepah baju.
2. Abg dah pukul brp ni masih lepak lagi.
Bebelan +ve (IBU B)
1. Abg baju masukkan dalam bakul, please.
2. Abg masuk mandi, lepas ni nak solat.
Generasi sekarang
Dapat habuan dulu cth ipad tp makesure solat, homework siap.
Generasi dulu
buat dulu smpi siap baru dapat habuan.
Third Session: Dr Tengku Asmadi
Education system di Malaysia tidak membongkar kemahiran anak-anak yg berbeza-beza.
cth : bila ada sebarisan haiwan monyet, gajah, ikan, anjing laut, penguin disuruh memanjat pokok. Dah tentu monyet tersengih lebar sbb mmg kemahiran dia memanjat. sedangkan haiwan lain tercengang je la dengan rasa kecewa.
- tengok kebolehan anak yang berbeza.
ASAS POWER PARENTING
💟agama
💟sahsiah
💟akademik
💟skil
💟AGAMA
Nak anak cemerlang
1. jaga waktu solat. solat awal waktu.
2. rajin baca al-quran.
-apabila anak rajin baca quran, anak jadi pintar.
-bila asas agama kukuh Insya Allah, rezeki murah.
Orang sekarang meminang tak tanya kerja apa. Mereka tanya boleh jd imam tak?
💟SAHSIAH
Sikap anak datang dari rumah
40% ibu bapa
60% guru, rakan, media
Jangan tonjolkan kelemahan kita depan anak.
cth: jgn kata negatif pun depan anak. spt merungut bila kita tak boleh buat sesuatu.
Hati2 apa kita buat. anak ikut.
Hati2 apa kita cakap. anak ikut.
Bila anak duduk sebelah kita. Dia tangkap/rekod apa yg dia nampak.
cth; bapa biasa suke ckp b*** bila sedang marah. terutamanya semasa memandu kereta bila ada kereta lain memotong. anak yang di sebelah tengok dan rekod. Itu yg dicakap nanti.
💟AKADEMIK
Hanya ada Akhlak baik, jujur, amanah tanpa ada ijazah boleh dapat kerja ke?
Boleh dengan berniaga.
Terima hakikat tak semua anak akademik ok.
Walaupun dia tak straight A di dunia, Insya Allah straight A di akhirat.
Jangan terlalu memaksa anak dapat A. sekadar kemampuan mereka.
💟SKILL
Orang ada skill boleh hidup.
Develop skill mereka spy mrk boleh cari rezeki.
cth tukang urut, goreng pisang, melukis, photographer.
Besarkan anak ikut zaman.
🚩Otak yg cerdik dlm usia 7 thn pertama. waktu ni beri pelbagai pendedahan.
🚩Perasaan ingin tahu anak-anak sangat kuat.
🚩Sekiranya dimarah bila mrk bertanya akan membantutkan perasaan ingin tahu mrk.
Statistik PDRM buat kajian anak yg lari dr rumah umur 15-19 thn.
sbb tu usia 8-14 ▶ kena tegas.
usia 15-19▶ jadikan mrk kawan. tegur cara baik.
💟BEBELAN POSITIF
▶berfikir dalam bentuk gambaran.
▶gambar bentuk tingkah laku.
Otak kita akan hasilkan apa yg kita gambarkan.
Perkataan 'JANGAN' tak tergambar dalam otak.
Otak tak boleh gambarkan perkataan 'JANGAN'
Otak percaya sekiranya dilakukan berulang2.
4 PERKARA PERLU PROGRAM OTAK
1. Cadangkan
2. Unik
3. Berulang2.
4. Emotionally strong.
cth. bayangkan sebakul durian.
cuba jangan bayangkan sebakul durian
▶tentu nak bayang jugakkan sebakul durian tu.
iklan di tv contohnya mmg gunakan 4 perkara di atas.
cth.
1. Aimankan anak mak yg pandai. betul ke pandai (not important)
2. Unik kan.
3. Ulang cakap
4. Emosi - Aimankan anak mak yg baik ( walau dlm keadaan marah)
Beza bebelan +ve dan -ve
Bebelan -ve (IBU A)
1. Abang kenapa bersepah baju.
2. Abg dah pukul brp ni masih lepak lagi.
Bebelan +ve (IBU B)
1. Abg baju masukkan dalam bakul, please.
2. Abg masuk mandi, lepas ni nak solat.
Generasi sekarang
Dapat habuan dulu cth ipad tp makesure solat, homework siap.
Generasi dulu
buat dulu smpi siap baru dapat habuan.
Power Parenting: Parenting Tanpa Stress - A review pt 2
PARENTING TANPA STRES
Second Session: Prof. Dato Dr Muhaya
✅ Kita akan dapat apa yang kita niatkan.
✅ Sebelum buat apa-apa, perlu ada niat yang jelas.
✅ Sentiasa buat refleksi diri:
1) Fizikal
2) Mental
3) Spiritual
✅ Fokus untuk didik hati
✅ Jiwa kita yang tenang, anak-anak kita tenang.
✅ Anak adalah anugerah Allah yang diberi melalui kita.
✅ Amanah ibubapa untuk didik anak-anak menjadi:
1) Hamba Allah yang taat kepada Allah.
2) Khalifah (bagi kebaikan kepada manusia).
3) Buat apa-apa ikut syariat.
✅ Fokus dalam keluarga hanyalah:
1) Syurga
2) Neraka
3) Dosa
4) Pahala
✅ Tips 5-US
1) Niat mesti lurus
2) Ibadat mesti bagus
3) Hati mesti tulus
4) Usaha mesti telus
5) Taubat mesti terus
✅ Hanya orang yang cinta dunia akan stress. Orang kaya ialah orang yang rasa cukup (qanaah).
✅ Sentiasa zikrullah dalam hati (daripada duduk saja-saja tu).
✅ Perkataan dan perbuatan mempengaruhi tenaga kita (perkataan dan perbuatan baik=tenaga kuat, perbuatan dan perkataan negatif=tenaga lemah)
✅ Fokus on developing yourself (berjaya atau tidak bergantung kepada berapa banyak kita nak berubah)
✅ Formula: Peristiwa+Respon=Hasil Kehidupan (depend kepada how we respon kepada peristiwa yang berlaku).
✅ Untuk berubah, sebut 4 perkara:
1) Alhamdulillah saya gembira dan bersyukur
2) Apakah 1 fikiran negatif yang halang saya jadi baik?
3) Apakah tabiat negatif yang cegah saya jadi baik? Try to fight tabiat buruk
4) Apakah tindakan yang kita boleh buat untuk ubah tabiat negatif tersebut?
✅ Kalau anak tak dengar cakap kita, tanya diri kita. Kita dengar tak cakap anak-anak kita?
✅ Kita degil dengan Allah, anak-anak konfem degil dengan kita
✅ 3 peringkat didikan anak-anak:
1) 0-7 tahun: Give love. Bagi kasih sayang
2) 8-14 tahun: Disiplin
3) 15-21 tahun: Be friend
✅ Hargai anak kita
✅ Jika perkara negatif berlaku, taubat dulu. Mintak ampun dari Allah
✅ Ubah diri sendiri dulu. Untuk ubah apa yang kita dapat, ubah apa yang kita beri. Pernah bagi negatif, akan dpt negatif. Bagi yang baik, dapat yang baik-baik.
✅ KUALITI SOLAT menentukan KUALITI KEHIDUPAN
Nota: Sila share dan sebarkan. Semoga bermanfaat untuk semua.
Second Session: Prof. Dato Dr Muhaya
✅ Kita akan dapat apa yang kita niatkan.
✅ Sebelum buat apa-apa, perlu ada niat yang jelas.
✅ Sentiasa buat refleksi diri:
1) Fizikal
2) Mental
3) Spiritual
✅ Fokus untuk didik hati
✅ Jiwa kita yang tenang, anak-anak kita tenang.
✅ Anak adalah anugerah Allah yang diberi melalui kita.
✅ Amanah ibubapa untuk didik anak-anak menjadi:
1) Hamba Allah yang taat kepada Allah.
2) Khalifah (bagi kebaikan kepada manusia).
3) Buat apa-apa ikut syariat.
✅ Fokus dalam keluarga hanyalah:
1) Syurga
2) Neraka
3) Dosa
4) Pahala
✅ Tips 5-US
1) Niat mesti lurus
2) Ibadat mesti bagus
3) Hati mesti tulus
4) Usaha mesti telus
5) Taubat mesti terus
✅ Hanya orang yang cinta dunia akan stress. Orang kaya ialah orang yang rasa cukup (qanaah).
✅ Sentiasa zikrullah dalam hati (daripada duduk saja-saja tu).
✅ Perkataan dan perbuatan mempengaruhi tenaga kita (perkataan dan perbuatan baik=tenaga kuat, perbuatan dan perkataan negatif=tenaga lemah)
✅ Fokus on developing yourself (berjaya atau tidak bergantung kepada berapa banyak kita nak berubah)
✅ Formula: Peristiwa+Respon=Hasil Kehidupan (depend kepada how we respon kepada peristiwa yang berlaku).
✅ Untuk berubah, sebut 4 perkara:
1) Alhamdulillah saya gembira dan bersyukur
2) Apakah 1 fikiran negatif yang halang saya jadi baik?
3) Apakah tabiat negatif yang cegah saya jadi baik? Try to fight tabiat buruk
4) Apakah tindakan yang kita boleh buat untuk ubah tabiat negatif tersebut?
✅ Kalau anak tak dengar cakap kita, tanya diri kita. Kita dengar tak cakap anak-anak kita?
✅ Kita degil dengan Allah, anak-anak konfem degil dengan kita
✅ 3 peringkat didikan anak-anak:
1) 0-7 tahun: Give love. Bagi kasih sayang
2) 8-14 tahun: Disiplin
3) 15-21 tahun: Be friend
✅ Hargai anak kita
✅ Jika perkara negatif berlaku, taubat dulu. Mintak ampun dari Allah
✅ Ubah diri sendiri dulu. Untuk ubah apa yang kita dapat, ubah apa yang kita beri. Pernah bagi negatif, akan dpt negatif. Bagi yang baik, dapat yang baik-baik.
✅ KUALITI SOLAT menentukan KUALITI KEHIDUPAN
Nota: Sila share dan sebarkan. Semoga bermanfaat untuk semua.
Monday, August 8, 2016
Power Parenting: Paradigma ibu bapa positif - A review pt 1
Catching up with my blog, so anyway, couple of weeks ago Love and I attended a talk called "Power Parenting". It's an 8 to 5pm event, RM120 per pax with talks from 5 icons:
1) Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah
2) Prof. Dr. Muhaya
3) Dr. Tengku Asmadi
4) Fadzli Yusof
5) Ustazah Isfadiah
It was my first to Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah's talk, and he quickly became my favourite! Not only due to his contents but also presentation. So many things I've learned from him. Here are some notes, taken during the talk but not by me, but by my friends in the session.
I guess, since they already typed them nicely, might as well just optimize them kan? I asked for their permission beforehand by the way, so no worries. Semoga mereka mendapat pahala berpanjangan.
Oh btw, if you would like to ask me whether you should go or not, I would REALLY HIGHLY recommend this talk as it will be one of your best investment, trust me!
PARADIGMA IBU BAPA POSITIF
First Session: Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah
✅ Don't ever claim "I am ok/aku dah ok" sebab: manusia mula jadi jahat bila dia rasa dia baik.
✅ Untuk sebarang perubahan: kene byk bersyukur sebab sgt ramai org tak bersyukur.
✅ Tanda-tanda org yg bersyukur:
1) Patuh perintah Allah
2) Lakukan setiap perkara dgn terbaik (always do the best in everything you do)
3) Bantu org tanpa syarat
4) Doakan org lain (org yg doakan org lain tanpa org itu ketahui, malaikat akan aminkan doanya dan doakan mende yg sama utk dirinya)
5) Maafkan org lain
✅ Asas utama: buat baik kepada kedua ibu bapamu supaya anak-anak mu berbuat baik kepada mu.
✅ Do good things no matter what.
✅ Rutin harian parents sebagai "inspirer": memberi inspirasi & contoh yg baik kepada anak-anak (ransang anak-anak & bagi penjelasan).
✅ Before do anything, DOA. (Apa yang mak ayah ckp itu DOA. Apa yang mak ayah fikir itu DOA. Maka, cakap & fikir yang baik-baik sahaja).
✅ Nak ubah orang lain, ubah diri sendiri dulu.
✅ 40 hari tak masuk dalam majlis ilmu, hati jadi gelap (majlis ilmu nowadays dah luas & senang didapati. Cth tengok majlis ilmu di tv @ internet).
✅ Manusia ditegur oleh Allah melalui manusia lain. Jadi, jangan marah/kecil hati bila ditegur. Jangan kecil hati walaupun cara menegur itu kurang hikmah.
✅ Kenal diri (siapa kenal diri, dia kenal Tuhannya).
✅ Mak ayah jangan marah-marah waktu pagi. Boleh menjejaskan emosi anak sepanjang hari.
✅ Kenapa mak bapak baik-baik, tapi anak jahat/tak dengar kata?
1) duit/rezeki TAK berkat (zakat tak dikeluarkan dengan sempurna. Zakat pendapatan tak setel. Ramai org terlepas pandang zakat emas dan perak)
✅ Kenapa mak bapak tak hebat mana dari segi pendidikan dan lain-lain tapi dapat anak yang baik-baik/pandai etc?
1) Amalan mak bapak itu sendiri (sentiasa doakan yang baik-baik kepada anak-anak & selalu mengaji quran) : sebab doa mak bapak mustajab
✅ Menurut kajian, anak yang nakal semasa kecil akan jadi orang dewasa yang bijaksana.
✅ Allah temukan yang terbaik untuk kita. Apa yang Allah bagi tak pernah silap (cth: jodoh).
✅ Kenal diri,
1) Kelebihan (gilap dan guna kelebihan yang ada pada diri kita untuk berjaya)
2) Kelemahan diri (atasi kelemahan diri untuk tujuan memperbaiki diri).
✅ Jangan risau anak tak dengar cakap kita, risaulah yang anak tengok diri kita (sebab anak akan tiru apa yg dia nampak).
✅ Rutin mak ayah yang cemerlang:
1) Solat wajib 5 waktu diawal waktu, solat-solat sunat tak tinggal terutama witir (setiap malam, bkn ramadhan sahaja), solat sunat taubat sebelom tido (jangan tido sebelom solat taubat).
2) Istighfar 70x setiap hari
3) Suami isteri memaafkan sebelom tido
4) Murnikan hati dengan sentiasa zikir, istighfar & solat taubat (semua ni membuka pintu rezeki)
5) Maafkan semua org sebelom tido
6) Tido mengiring ke kanan, baca doa & 3 Qul (kalau kita buat ni sebelom tido, setiap saat kita tido dapat pahala)
✅ GAMBAR YANG JELAS ITU ADALAH DOA YANG PALING MAKBUL
✅ Cara belajar yang betol:
1) duduk di kerusi/meja study
2) mengadap kiblat
3) Baca doa & surah Al Insyirah
4) Sebelom belajar, doakan guru-guru
✅ Setiap arahan pada anak, perlu ada gambaran.
1) Contoh arahan yg SALAH : Makan elok-elok (tiada gambaran disini macam mana cara nak makan elok-elok & anak tak bole proses arahan tu sebab dia pon tak tau macam mana nak makan elok-elok)
2) Contoh arahan yang BETUL: Irsyad, Amna.. Nak makan duduk, pastu baca doa makan & makan pakai tangan kanan ye.. (Dari sini anak dapat gambarkan macam mana cara nak terima arahan sebab gambaran yang diberikan oleh mak ayah nya jelas).
✅ Cara didik anak lelaki: guna logik & terangkan kenapa boleh kenapa tak boleh
✅ Cara didik anak perempuan: guna emosi ( kasih sayang & pujian. Puji untuk tingkatkan aura positif anak.
✅ Bentuk matlamat yang JELAS dan bentuk MISI dalam keluarga (contoh: ayah nak anak ayah jaga solat diawal waktu & baca quran lepas solat.
✅ Anak-anak kita SEMUANYA hebat tetapi berbeza-beza.
✅ Waktu maghrib, jangan benarkan anak keluar rumah melepasi waktu Maghrib (pesan Nabi untuk kita berada didalam rumah diwaktu Maghrib).
✅ Baca quran (rumah yang dibaca kan al Quran didalamnya Allah bagi rahmat).
✅ Dalam rumahtangga kita, HARAMKAN perkataan Negatif.
✅ Ibu bapa berubah dulu sebelom nak ubah anak-anak.
✅ Sentiasa ingatkan anak-anak tentang ibadah.
✅ Sebelom masuk rumah:
1) Baca Bismillah+ Surah Al Ikhlas+ salam = orang-orang dalam rumah & jiran =kaya (Hadis Sahih).
✅ Cara nak cari hidayah & rahmat Allah: terima tetamu dengan ikhlas kerana tetamu membawa masuk 1000 hidayah & membawa balik 1000 maghfirah.
✅ Parents please: No gadget at home. Gadget adalah untuk merapatkan yang jauh. Jangan kerana gadget ia menjauhkan yang dekat. Pukul 9-11pm no gadget. Simpan dalam almari.
✅ Waktu yang paling jitu untuk nasihatkan anak-anak:
1) Sebelom tido
2) Nasihat semasa tido: luarbiasa hebat
3) 30 saat baru bangun tido
4) Selepas mandi (gelombang Alfa dikeluarkan oleh tubuh anak memberikan ketenangan kepada anak)
5) Selepas solat
6) Selepas mengaji quran
7) Selepas didoakan anak dengan (Al Fatihah, Ayat Kursi, Al Insyirah, Ayat 1-5 Surat Toha, surah Al Hasyr (lau anzalna hazal quran..)
✅ Jangan lupa bangun pagi doa "Allahumma inni asaluka ilman nafia wa rizqan toyyiba wa amalan mutaqobbala"
✅ Selalu baca doa elak malas dan sifat negative
✅ Sentiasa baca Bismillah 5 untuk perlindungan diri
Nota: Sila sebarkan ilmu ini. Semoga bermanfaat.
1) Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah
2) Prof. Dr. Muhaya
3) Dr. Tengku Asmadi
4) Fadzli Yusof
5) Ustazah Isfadiah
It was my first to Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah's talk, and he quickly became my favourite! Not only due to his contents but also presentation. So many things I've learned from him. Here are some notes, taken during the talk but not by me, but by my friends in the session.
I guess, since they already typed them nicely, might as well just optimize them kan? I asked for their permission beforehand by the way, so no worries. Semoga mereka mendapat pahala berpanjangan.
Oh btw, if you would like to ask me whether you should go or not, I would REALLY HIGHLY recommend this talk as it will be one of your best investment, trust me!
PARADIGMA IBU BAPA POSITIF
First Session: Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah
✅ Don't ever claim "I am ok/aku dah ok" sebab: manusia mula jadi jahat bila dia rasa dia baik.
✅ Untuk sebarang perubahan: kene byk bersyukur sebab sgt ramai org tak bersyukur.
✅ Tanda-tanda org yg bersyukur:
1) Patuh perintah Allah
2) Lakukan setiap perkara dgn terbaik (always do the best in everything you do)
3) Bantu org tanpa syarat
4) Doakan org lain (org yg doakan org lain tanpa org itu ketahui, malaikat akan aminkan doanya dan doakan mende yg sama utk dirinya)
5) Maafkan org lain
✅ Asas utama: buat baik kepada kedua ibu bapamu supaya anak-anak mu berbuat baik kepada mu.
✅ Do good things no matter what.
✅ Rutin harian parents sebagai "inspirer": memberi inspirasi & contoh yg baik kepada anak-anak (ransang anak-anak & bagi penjelasan).
✅ Before do anything, DOA. (Apa yang mak ayah ckp itu DOA. Apa yang mak ayah fikir itu DOA. Maka, cakap & fikir yang baik-baik sahaja).
✅ Nak ubah orang lain, ubah diri sendiri dulu.
✅ 40 hari tak masuk dalam majlis ilmu, hati jadi gelap (majlis ilmu nowadays dah luas & senang didapati. Cth tengok majlis ilmu di tv @ internet).
✅ Manusia ditegur oleh Allah melalui manusia lain. Jadi, jangan marah/kecil hati bila ditegur. Jangan kecil hati walaupun cara menegur itu kurang hikmah.
✅ Kenal diri (siapa kenal diri, dia kenal Tuhannya).
✅ Mak ayah jangan marah-marah waktu pagi. Boleh menjejaskan emosi anak sepanjang hari.
✅ Kenapa mak bapak baik-baik, tapi anak jahat/tak dengar kata?
1) duit/rezeki TAK berkat (zakat tak dikeluarkan dengan sempurna. Zakat pendapatan tak setel. Ramai org terlepas pandang zakat emas dan perak)
✅ Kenapa mak bapak tak hebat mana dari segi pendidikan dan lain-lain tapi dapat anak yang baik-baik/pandai etc?
1) Amalan mak bapak itu sendiri (sentiasa doakan yang baik-baik kepada anak-anak & selalu mengaji quran) : sebab doa mak bapak mustajab
✅ Menurut kajian, anak yang nakal semasa kecil akan jadi orang dewasa yang bijaksana.
✅ Allah temukan yang terbaik untuk kita. Apa yang Allah bagi tak pernah silap (cth: jodoh).
✅ Kenal diri,
1) Kelebihan (gilap dan guna kelebihan yang ada pada diri kita untuk berjaya)
2) Kelemahan diri (atasi kelemahan diri untuk tujuan memperbaiki diri).
✅ Jangan risau anak tak dengar cakap kita, risaulah yang anak tengok diri kita (sebab anak akan tiru apa yg dia nampak).
✅ Rutin mak ayah yang cemerlang:
1) Solat wajib 5 waktu diawal waktu, solat-solat sunat tak tinggal terutama witir (setiap malam, bkn ramadhan sahaja), solat sunat taubat sebelom tido (jangan tido sebelom solat taubat).
2) Istighfar 70x setiap hari
3) Suami isteri memaafkan sebelom tido
4) Murnikan hati dengan sentiasa zikir, istighfar & solat taubat (semua ni membuka pintu rezeki)
5) Maafkan semua org sebelom tido
6) Tido mengiring ke kanan, baca doa & 3 Qul (kalau kita buat ni sebelom tido, setiap saat kita tido dapat pahala)
✅ GAMBAR YANG JELAS ITU ADALAH DOA YANG PALING MAKBUL
✅ Cara belajar yang betol:
1) duduk di kerusi/meja study
2) mengadap kiblat
3) Baca doa & surah Al Insyirah
4) Sebelom belajar, doakan guru-guru
✅ Setiap arahan pada anak, perlu ada gambaran.
1) Contoh arahan yg SALAH : Makan elok-elok (tiada gambaran disini macam mana cara nak makan elok-elok & anak tak bole proses arahan tu sebab dia pon tak tau macam mana nak makan elok-elok)
2) Contoh arahan yang BETUL: Irsyad, Amna.. Nak makan duduk, pastu baca doa makan & makan pakai tangan kanan ye.. (Dari sini anak dapat gambarkan macam mana cara nak terima arahan sebab gambaran yang diberikan oleh mak ayah nya jelas).
✅ Cara didik anak lelaki: guna logik & terangkan kenapa boleh kenapa tak boleh
✅ Cara didik anak perempuan: guna emosi ( kasih sayang & pujian. Puji untuk tingkatkan aura positif anak.
✅ Bentuk matlamat yang JELAS dan bentuk MISI dalam keluarga (contoh: ayah nak anak ayah jaga solat diawal waktu & baca quran lepas solat.
✅ Anak-anak kita SEMUANYA hebat tetapi berbeza-beza.
✅ Waktu maghrib, jangan benarkan anak keluar rumah melepasi waktu Maghrib (pesan Nabi untuk kita berada didalam rumah diwaktu Maghrib).
✅ Baca quran (rumah yang dibaca kan al Quran didalamnya Allah bagi rahmat).
✅ Dalam rumahtangga kita, HARAMKAN perkataan Negatif.
✅ Ibu bapa berubah dulu sebelom nak ubah anak-anak.
✅ Sentiasa ingatkan anak-anak tentang ibadah.
✅ Sebelom masuk rumah:
1) Baca Bismillah+ Surah Al Ikhlas+ salam = orang-orang dalam rumah & jiran =kaya (Hadis Sahih).
✅ Cara nak cari hidayah & rahmat Allah: terima tetamu dengan ikhlas kerana tetamu membawa masuk 1000 hidayah & membawa balik 1000 maghfirah.
✅ Parents please: No gadget at home. Gadget adalah untuk merapatkan yang jauh. Jangan kerana gadget ia menjauhkan yang dekat. Pukul 9-11pm no gadget. Simpan dalam almari.
✅ Waktu yang paling jitu untuk nasihatkan anak-anak:
1) Sebelom tido
2) Nasihat semasa tido: luarbiasa hebat
3) 30 saat baru bangun tido
4) Selepas mandi (gelombang Alfa dikeluarkan oleh tubuh anak memberikan ketenangan kepada anak)
5) Selepas solat
6) Selepas mengaji quran
7) Selepas didoakan anak dengan (Al Fatihah, Ayat Kursi, Al Insyirah, Ayat 1-5 Surat Toha, surah Al Hasyr (lau anzalna hazal quran..)
✅ Jangan lupa bangun pagi doa "Allahumma inni asaluka ilman nafia wa rizqan toyyiba wa amalan mutaqobbala"
✅ Selalu baca doa elak malas dan sifat negative
✅ Sentiasa baca Bismillah 5 untuk perlindungan diri
Nota: Sila sebarkan ilmu ini. Semoga bermanfaat.
Monday, July 18, 2016
The kids' supporter
Now that Khaira all grown up, she made friends easily. Especially during Raya; mostly she could really click, but not always.
Aisha, well she would be minding her own business most of the time. That includes running and jumping non-stop, Mashaa Allah. I just kept on telling myself that sweating is good for her immune system, or else I'd go crazy.
As for Khaira, she lovesss to bring her toys everywhere. When I said toys; read: stones that she picked up outside my grandmother's house mcm tak pernah jumpa batu, extra straws she requested from kakak jual air kelapa mcm I tak belikan dia actual toys or even.. "kemuncup" (T_T) Her favourite somehow.
Ironically, these things are the ones that caused arguments between the kids her age. These kids also want that exact stone/straw/kemuncup, I couldn't even brain guys.
Previously, I asked her to share.
Then, my mom said something that impacted me greatly. I rarely share stuff with anybody in my life. Had my own toys, own room, my own car, my own everything.
And here, I'm asking my girls to share.
My mom's reasoning is simple: so that each of us have a sense of belonging and to know that "NO" is a perfectly legitimate answer.
So, I tried to balance things out, but I don't quite sure how to do it. I guess when Khaira was playing with that something and other kids took that thing from her, I'd just observe for Khaira to fight for her stuff back so it won't get worse.. Else, I'd just ask her to lend it to her friends.
As of now, it works fine for me so I'm just gonna stick with the rules.
Plus I read something recently and realizing that, made me somehow a lot calmer.
Also worth sharing that, Maznah from www.maznahibrahim.com shared something with me recently that I thought worth sharing with all of us, mommies..
"Namun bahan penebat non material paling MAHAL, UTAMA dan PERCUMA, ialah diri Mak ayah sndiri. Kita adalah penebat emosi terbaik utk anak-anak rasa selesa ;) Maka, jadilah diri kita sendiri, seperti mahunya Allah untuk kita jadi Ibubapa Yang Baik, bukan Mahunya Masyarakat yang sesekali jumpa. Bersederhana. (anak jumpa kita setiap hari, kita adalah sokongan dia. Untuk kita, Allah 365-24-7-60 dengan kita, Allah bantu kita atau penebat kita)."
Aisha, well she would be minding her own business most of the time. That includes running and jumping non-stop, Mashaa Allah. I just kept on telling myself that sweating is good for her immune system, or else I'd go crazy.
As for Khaira, she lovesss to bring her toys everywhere. When I said toys; read: stones that she picked up outside my grandmother's house mcm tak pernah jumpa batu, extra straws she requested from kakak jual air kelapa mcm I tak belikan dia actual toys or even.. "kemuncup" (T_T) Her favourite somehow.
Ironically, these things are the ones that caused arguments between the kids her age. These kids also want that exact stone/straw/kemuncup, I couldn't even brain guys.
 |
| Back at my kampung in Bukit Melawati, Kuala Selangor. |
Previously, I asked her to share.
Then, my mom said something that impacted me greatly. I rarely share stuff with anybody in my life. Had my own toys, own room, my own car, my own everything.
And here, I'm asking my girls to share.
My mom's reasoning is simple: so that each of us have a sense of belonging and to know that "NO" is a perfectly legitimate answer.
So, I tried to balance things out, but I don't quite sure how to do it. I guess when Khaira was playing with that something and other kids took that thing from her, I'd just observe for Khaira to fight for her stuff back so it won't get worse.. Else, I'd just ask her to lend it to her friends.
As of now, it works fine for me so I'm just gonna stick with the rules.
Plus I read something recently and realizing that, made me somehow a lot calmer.
Also worth sharing that, Maznah from www.maznahibrahim.com shared something with me recently that I thought worth sharing with all of us, mommies..
"Namun bahan penebat non material paling MAHAL, UTAMA dan PERCUMA, ialah diri Mak ayah sndiri. Kita adalah penebat emosi terbaik utk anak-anak rasa selesa ;) Maka, jadilah diri kita sendiri, seperti mahunya Allah untuk kita jadi Ibubapa Yang Baik, bukan Mahunya Masyarakat yang sesekali jumpa. Bersederhana. (anak jumpa kita setiap hari, kita adalah sokongan dia. Untuk kita, Allah 365-24-7-60 dengan kita, Allah bantu kita atau penebat kita)."
Have a wonderful Raya entertaining your little ones, your amanah everyone! :)
Tuesday, June 28, 2016
My view on vaccination
So, I received quite a number of questions via WA or FB asking me whether I vaccinate my girls. Perhaps due to the fact that I am pro on natural birth and quite an organic junkie myself (so hippie).
The answer is yes, I have fully vaccinated both of my girls; all in the wajib list and am considering on doing pneumococcal as their additional vaccination.
Why I vaccinated them is simply because I haven't studied the pros and cons of vaccination, I am not well informed of them, so I opt for the norm.
A friend I knew through a homeschooling group recently asked, "If you trust in modern medications, ie. vaccinations, why did you do natural births then?"
Reason is, I studied a great deal on natural birth before I opted for it. I went to gentle birth classes, which was an eye opener. Read lots of books. Asked lots of experienced people. Of course, that doesn't make me a doctor, I mean a medical doctor. So, I sat down with my gynae and had a long discussion on my case. If you read my story on first birth, you knew how many time I changed gynae until I found one at a very last minutes, two weeks before I gave birth. Who agreed with my terms and conditions and advised me accordingly.
She gave me almost all of the things I wanted on my birthing list. In return, Allah SWT gave her what she wanted from me as well, a healthy low risk pregnant mummy. The gynae was so cool that for my second child, I gave birth in my baju rumah so leisurely. And even added that she suggested me to do homebirth for third baby where she will be sending an MO over.
My point is, we call somebody an expert for a reason. So, with mutual understanding, both of you will get what you want. Doctors are not monsters. They are moms just like us.
When Khaira had frequent cough last time and was always on antibiotics, I came clean to the paed if there's an alternative way I can go about without frequent consumption of antibiotics. I followed her advised and until now, Alhamdulillah Khaira recovered from cough without cough meds and antibiotics anymore, except one time when we got back from oversea. The paed prescribed a cough med and antibiotics after a year and I asked, "Is there any way I could avoid these? Will there be any side effects?"
And I hold on to what the dear paed told me, "It's a drug, of course mild side effects are probable. But, in this case, we have to weigh which one is more important: a mild probable side effect but high possibility that she'll get better or a high probability she'll get worse and no probability of mild side effect."
That clears the air enough for me. I trusted her judgement, because she is an expert in the matter way better than I am.
So, what's my view on those who did not vaccinate their kids?
It's your choice, really. Everyone wants to be the best mother to their child.
When I chose Khaira's previous kindy, I spent months looking for the best kindy because I only want what's best for my daughter. But, if you read my story before, you'd realize the irony: what I thought was best for her, really was not for her, perhaps the worst.
So, sometimes, what you thought is best for your kids, might not be the best for them.
I read that some refused to vaccinate their kids due to eczema. I have lived my entire life with eczema, I have no fingerprints due to that (Imagine my banking and travelling hassle), I used to wake up sneezing every morning until noon, the worst acne ugh!, and even nearly had blood transfusion due to antibiotics intolerant (I have recovered from my eczema after going organic and years of homeopathy treatment), trust me I thank my parents everyday for vaccinating me, because again the weighing down: I'd rather have my eczema, Alhamdulillah.
Then, there's an autism issue, which I dare not touch because like I said, I'm not an expert in the matter. But always come to the paed's point on weighing down the possibility.
If you have studied really thoroughly (I mean from classes, of course I don't trust Internet that much) and discussed with your gynae, if your baby really have intolerant towards vaccination, then who am I to judge? I hope by vaccinating my kids, yours will get the herd immunity.
But, I am having difficulties in understanding those who did not vaccinate their kids because "ikut sunnah", and these vaccinations are "agenda Yahudi". Amboi, sedapnya accusation, sekali fitnah nanti.
When I went to Umrah last time, I was supposed to have my menses a couple of days before I went there (wrong timing, unstable cycle due to breastfeeding), so I asked the Ustaz whether I should take a pill. I saw lots of doa to postpone your menses, can I depend just on them.
And the Ustaz said something that I will hold on into, "In Islam, we are thought to Usaha fist, then Tawakkal comes in".
Took the pill, and doa. All come from Allah swt, not the pills, but of course Allah SWT sees our usaha, even it is smaller than zahrah kan.
That is my thought on vaccination as well.
"Agenda Yahudi" is something lame for me. When I was in gentle birthing communities, some minor voices mentioned about the so called "Agenda Yahudi" as well. But, who knew if it's the other way around.
When people are so obsessed into something, they sometimes failed to look at it as a whole. Then, happen lotus birth and consumption of umbilical cord in Muslim. And claiming methods and meds from doctors are "agenda Yahudi".
Pening.
Oh, on my pills consumption story, after taking the pills, the probable side effects as mentioned by the doctor happened to me in Makkah, I had some spotting for couple of days which made me could not enter the Masjidil Haraam. Boy, was I sad? Let's put it this way, those times I could not enter Masjidil Haraam were the saddest days of my entire life, really. I cried until I got sick. The spotting stopped once I stopped consuming the pills.
Did I regret taking it?
I redha beacuse it is my Qadha' and Qadr.
So, for those who did not vaccinate their kids, if you are aware of the risks and okay with them, again I am in no position to judge you. So far, my friends yang tak vaccinate their kids pon have healthy kids, I trust juga Allah swt pelihara all the hamba yang have unshaken faith and always doa for their kids.
Jangan jadi lalang, follow without in depth knowledge. Ini yang buat orang marah.
Mutual agreement, agree to disagree. No need bashing in FB ok?
The answer is yes, I have fully vaccinated both of my girls; all in the wajib list and am considering on doing pneumococcal as their additional vaccination.
Why I vaccinated them is simply because I haven't studied the pros and cons of vaccination, I am not well informed of them, so I opt for the norm.
A friend I knew through a homeschooling group recently asked, "If you trust in modern medications, ie. vaccinations, why did you do natural births then?"
Reason is, I studied a great deal on natural birth before I opted for it. I went to gentle birth classes, which was an eye opener. Read lots of books. Asked lots of experienced people. Of course, that doesn't make me a doctor, I mean a medical doctor. So, I sat down with my gynae and had a long discussion on my case. If you read my story on first birth, you knew how many time I changed gynae until I found one at a very last minutes, two weeks before I gave birth. Who agreed with my terms and conditions and advised me accordingly.
She gave me almost all of the things I wanted on my birthing list. In return, Allah SWT gave her what she wanted from me as well, a healthy low risk pregnant mummy. The gynae was so cool that for my second child, I gave birth in my baju rumah so leisurely. And even added that she suggested me to do homebirth for third baby where she will be sending an MO over.
My point is, we call somebody an expert for a reason. So, with mutual understanding, both of you will get what you want. Doctors are not monsters. They are moms just like us.
When Khaira had frequent cough last time and was always on antibiotics, I came clean to the paed if there's an alternative way I can go about without frequent consumption of antibiotics. I followed her advised and until now, Alhamdulillah Khaira recovered from cough without cough meds and antibiotics anymore, except one time when we got back from oversea. The paed prescribed a cough med and antibiotics after a year and I asked, "Is there any way I could avoid these? Will there be any side effects?"
And I hold on to what the dear paed told me, "It's a drug, of course mild side effects are probable. But, in this case, we have to weigh which one is more important: a mild probable side effect but high possibility that she'll get better or a high probability she'll get worse and no probability of mild side effect."
That clears the air enough for me. I trusted her judgement, because she is an expert in the matter way better than I am.
So, what's my view on those who did not vaccinate their kids?
It's your choice, really. Everyone wants to be the best mother to their child.
When I chose Khaira's previous kindy, I spent months looking for the best kindy because I only want what's best for my daughter. But, if you read my story before, you'd realize the irony: what I thought was best for her, really was not for her, perhaps the worst.
So, sometimes, what you thought is best for your kids, might not be the best for them.
I read that some refused to vaccinate their kids due to eczema. I have lived my entire life with eczema, I have no fingerprints due to that (Imagine my banking and travelling hassle), I used to wake up sneezing every morning until noon, the worst acne ugh!, and even nearly had blood transfusion due to antibiotics intolerant (I have recovered from my eczema after going organic and years of homeopathy treatment), trust me I thank my parents everyday for vaccinating me, because again the weighing down: I'd rather have my eczema, Alhamdulillah.
Then, there's an autism issue, which I dare not touch because like I said, I'm not an expert in the matter. But always come to the paed's point on weighing down the possibility.
If you have studied really thoroughly (I mean from classes, of course I don't trust Internet that much) and discussed with your gynae, if your baby really have intolerant towards vaccination, then who am I to judge? I hope by vaccinating my kids, yours will get the herd immunity.
But, I am having difficulties in understanding those who did not vaccinate their kids because "ikut sunnah", and these vaccinations are "agenda Yahudi". Amboi, sedapnya accusation, sekali fitnah nanti.
When I went to Umrah last time, I was supposed to have my menses a couple of days before I went there (wrong timing, unstable cycle due to breastfeeding), so I asked the Ustaz whether I should take a pill. I saw lots of doa to postpone your menses, can I depend just on them.
And the Ustaz said something that I will hold on into, "In Islam, we are thought to Usaha fist, then Tawakkal comes in".
Took the pill, and doa. All come from Allah swt, not the pills, but of course Allah SWT sees our usaha, even it is smaller than zahrah kan.
That is my thought on vaccination as well.
"Agenda Yahudi" is something lame for me. When I was in gentle birthing communities, some minor voices mentioned about the so called "Agenda Yahudi" as well. But, who knew if it's the other way around.
When people are so obsessed into something, they sometimes failed to look at it as a whole. Then, happen lotus birth and consumption of umbilical cord in Muslim. And claiming methods and meds from doctors are "agenda Yahudi".
Pening.
Oh, on my pills consumption story, after taking the pills, the probable side effects as mentioned by the doctor happened to me in Makkah, I had some spotting for couple of days which made me could not enter the Masjidil Haraam. Boy, was I sad? Let's put it this way, those times I could not enter Masjidil Haraam were the saddest days of my entire life, really. I cried until I got sick. The spotting stopped once I stopped consuming the pills.
Did I regret taking it?
I redha beacuse it is my Qadha' and Qadr.
So, for those who did not vaccinate their kids, if you are aware of the risks and okay with them, again I am in no position to judge you. So far, my friends yang tak vaccinate their kids pon have healthy kids, I trust juga Allah swt pelihara all the hamba yang have unshaken faith and always doa for their kids.
Jangan jadi lalang, follow without in depth knowledge. Ini yang buat orang marah.
Mutual agreement, agree to disagree. No need bashing in FB ok?
Monday, May 9, 2016
That 13 things by Tech Insider
I came across this article online: Science says parents of successful kids have these 13 things in common
I somehow found this very interesting as it is not generalizing as what most parenting articles did. So, I thought of sharing point number 1, 8, 9, 10, 12 and 13.
1. They make their kids do chores.
8. They're less stressed.
9. They value effort over avoiding failure.
10. The moms work.
12: They are 'authoritative' rather than 'authoritarian' or 'permissive.'
13: They teach 'grit.'
Actually, they are all inter related, I must say. Well, at least for me.
Here was my cycle back in Khaira's early days.
I am, as you know a working mom (Point 10). I did everything for my little girl, including literally feed her, put her clothes on, cleaning up her toys (Point 1). What did I become? A little bit stressed at the end of the day (Point 8). The reason I did that was because I didn't like the mess. The mess from her food when she ate by herself and her toys were not organized as what I wanted it to be (Point 9). And I became too tired to scold her (Point 12), so what did I achieve? A short term goal everytime (Point 13).
There I summed it all.
But it wasn't long until I have that wake up call.
Once we sent her to kindy at 3y2m, I learned my lesson the hardest way. She refused to eat on her own, didn't know how to clean herself after peeing, to conclude: she hated kindy, I hated sending her to kindy. Such evil cycle.
So, I slowly changed. And hoping to change further. Kaizen, continuous improvement,
I am still, as you know a working mom (Point 10). Hopefully, I will forever make full use of the short time I have with my daughters at the end of the day.
Now, I let my girls be independent. I let Aisha wore her own clothes now, fed herself most of the time, put her toys back in the box. (Point 1). I observed by doing so, the girls have better psychomotor skills.
The mess? Yeah, it is still causing me stress at times especially when PMS. I am still looking for ways to overcome this. (Point 8).
But perhaps (Point 9) could be my motivation. Valuing effort over failure, I must reallllllyyyyy try that. This morning I read a friend's sharing in Facebook which really hits me. She asked her 5yo son to clean the floor. The result? Very messy with water everywhere. If it was me, sudahku jadi singa betina. But, she acknowledged the effort, taught her son the right way to do it and gave him the same chores the next week and the following week and the following until her son became an expert in cleaning the floor. I must think of the 'grit'; the long term value (Point 13). Bersenang-senang kemudian.
To make her better, I guess, I must be more authoritative; in a good way. (Point 12) By understanding them, and direct them in a way they can listen. Must have Point 7 then: develop a relationship with their kids.
So many things to learn.
By the way, Point number 3 is that "They have high expectations." Guess it reminded me of who?
Yeah, both my parents. I have said so many times before not to be like that.
Now, I am considering.
I somehow found this very interesting as it is not generalizing as what most parenting articles did. So, I thought of sharing point number 1, 8, 9, 10, 12 and 13.
1. They make their kids do chores.
8. They're less stressed.
9. They value effort over avoiding failure.
10. The moms work.
12: They are 'authoritative' rather than 'authoritarian' or 'permissive.'
13: They teach 'grit.'
Actually, they are all inter related, I must say. Well, at least for me.
Here was my cycle back in Khaira's early days.
I am, as you know a working mom (Point 10). I did everything for my little girl, including literally feed her, put her clothes on, cleaning up her toys (Point 1). What did I become? A little bit stressed at the end of the day (Point 8). The reason I did that was because I didn't like the mess. The mess from her food when she ate by herself and her toys were not organized as what I wanted it to be (Point 9). And I became too tired to scold her (Point 12), so what did I achieve? A short term goal everytime (Point 13).
There I summed it all.
But it wasn't long until I have that wake up call.
Once we sent her to kindy at 3y2m, I learned my lesson the hardest way. She refused to eat on her own, didn't know how to clean herself after peeing, to conclude: she hated kindy, I hated sending her to kindy. Such evil cycle.
So, I slowly changed. And hoping to change further. Kaizen, continuous improvement,
I am still, as you know a working mom (Point 10). Hopefully, I will forever make full use of the short time I have with my daughters at the end of the day.
Now, I let my girls be independent. I let Aisha wore her own clothes now, fed herself most of the time, put her toys back in the box. (Point 1). I observed by doing so, the girls have better psychomotor skills.
The mess? Yeah, it is still causing me stress at times especially when PMS. I am still looking for ways to overcome this. (Point 8).
But perhaps (Point 9) could be my motivation. Valuing effort over failure, I must reallllllyyyyy try that. This morning I read a friend's sharing in Facebook which really hits me. She asked her 5yo son to clean the floor. The result? Very messy with water everywhere. If it was me, sudahku jadi singa betina. But, she acknowledged the effort, taught her son the right way to do it and gave him the same chores the next week and the following week and the following until her son became an expert in cleaning the floor. I must think of the 'grit'; the long term value (Point 13). Bersenang-senang kemudian.
To make her better, I guess, I must be more authoritative; in a good way. (Point 12) By understanding them, and direct them in a way they can listen. Must have Point 7 then: develop a relationship with their kids.
So many things to learn.
By the way, Point number 3 is that "They have high expectations." Guess it reminded me of who?
Yeah, both my parents. I have said so many times before not to be like that.
Now, I am considering.
Thursday, December 17, 2015
School holiday activities
So what's Khaira doing at home during this long holiday break?
Basically, before I leave to work, I would give her 5 pages of homework. Be it tracing or maths, but very simple ones. Just to discipline her.
Then, she would play all day and watch TV. Her favourite shows at the moment are Ultraman, Ninja Turtles and Didi and Friends. I bought her lots of arts and crafts stuff as well. Mostly from Toys R Us, I borong so many last Christmas as it got way too cheap. So mommies, YES is nearing.. go grab yours.
I also just discovered that Mr. DIY has so many arts and crafts items for kids with the price of just 10% from what I paid to buy stuff in Toys R Us. For example, I bought this keychain for Khaira to colour below for RM3.90.
At night, she would:
1. Revise 5 surahs.
2. 3 pages of reading. Her current read, and first story book. Now at pg 50.
3. Mengaji plus a line hafazan from the current surah she is at. She is now in her 17th surah.
4. Then, she would do one of these:
a) spelling on Monday
b) English reading on Tuesday, Thursday
c) Maths on Wednesday
d) Mind games on Friday
All these would take less than half an hour.
As for Aisha, she would play all day and watch TV. At night, 3 minutes or less on flashcards. And.. that's it. Yesterday, I decided to eat first before teaching them as opposed to norm. But just after Maghrib, she took her own book and sat where we usually sit waiting for me.
Hehe.. body clock.
Ya Allah, semoga the Asyikins istiqamah. Ameen.
Basically, before I leave to work, I would give her 5 pages of homework. Be it tracing or maths, but very simple ones. Just to discipline her.
Then, she would play all day and watch TV. Her favourite shows at the moment are Ultraman, Ninja Turtles and Didi and Friends. I bought her lots of arts and crafts stuff as well. Mostly from Toys R Us, I borong so many last Christmas as it got way too cheap. So mommies, YES is nearing.. go grab yours.
I also just discovered that Mr. DIY has so many arts and crafts items for kids with the price of just 10% from what I paid to buy stuff in Toys R Us. For example, I bought this keychain for Khaira to colour below for RM3.90.
At night, she would:
1. Revise 5 surahs.
2. 3 pages of reading. Her current read, and first story book. Now at pg 50.
3. Mengaji plus a line hafazan from the current surah she is at. She is now in her 17th surah.
4. Then, she would do one of these:
a) spelling on Monday
b) English reading on Tuesday, Thursday
c) Maths on Wednesday
d) Mind games on Friday
All these would take less than half an hour.
As for Aisha, she would play all day and watch TV. At night, 3 minutes or less on flashcards. And.. that's it. Yesterday, I decided to eat first before teaching them as opposed to norm. But just after Maghrib, she took her own book and sat where we usually sit waiting for me.
Hehe.. body clock.
Ya Allah, semoga the Asyikins istiqamah. Ameen.
Thursday, November 19, 2015
Aisha's flashcards progress
By now, Aisha is 15 months old.
Similar to Khaira during her age, she is at a stage where she is learning hijaiyah flashcards.
Although this time around I've learned that we should start earlier, I found it less easy to commit with the two girls. Love arrived from work around 9pm everyday, I arrived around 6.30 pm. So I was rushing like mad everynight to find time to teach Khaira and Aisha before Aisha fell asleep. But after she turned 1 and has a fixed sleep time, I became more discipline.
 |
| Back |
 |
| Front |
For Aisha, I tried a different set of flashcard which suits her personality more. The flashcards are from Little Qari.
These flashcards are equipped with images at the back to assist you on what to act to that particular letter so it would be easier for your children to memorize.
Example; dzho for zikir.
She's still progressing so far. Able to pronounce a few letters, Alhamdulillah. I hope to be more istiqamah after this. 5 minutes a day in shaa Allah.
Saturday, July 25, 2015
Khaira qatams Al Barqy!
At 3y9m.. Khaira qatams Al Barqy and started her Quran already. Alhamdulillah. Yet to be fluent. In a mean while, needs 5 mins practice everyday still.
Enjoy her video peeps..
Enjoy her video peeps..
Sunday, June 14, 2015
IPN's mental arithmetic class - a review
So I spent my Saturday here..
Been to right brain last year, so I only attended the mental arithmetic ones. Read my review on right brain here.
I was introduced by my dad to mental arithmetic class when I was in Standard 3. He sent me to UC Mas a tad bit too late because I was so used of the old method and thought my congak was so much faster than mental arithmetic.
I was one of the best; if not the best math student in my school. Inherited it from my dad, so congak became a nature to me. I lost interest in mental arithmetic which caused me to skip tuition and spent my two hours in playground having Maggi Ayam instant with my friend instead.
Dear Allah, please let my daughters be so much better than me.
Anyhow, I have always thought mental arithmetic is useful. Was sooo happy attending the class with Puan Lina's aura; please please please go. I had so much fun.
Having said that, let me give you an overview on how to introduce mental arithmetic for your kids.
You need an abacus; train them with abacus first before they can do mental arithmetic.
The most common abacus is split into two basic rows:
the top row for the "5"s, and
the bottom row for the "ones".
I did this using powerpoint so you guys can have a clearer picture on how to use the abacus. So first, these are all that you need to teach your kids, and currently what I'm teaching Khaira. I tried only once a week with her.
I will update the next step. Till then, doakan for the strength for me to write more often!
Been to right brain last year, so I only attended the mental arithmetic ones. Read my review on right brain here.
I was introduced by my dad to mental arithmetic class when I was in Standard 3. He sent me to UC Mas a tad bit too late because I was so used of the old method and thought my congak was so much faster than mental arithmetic.
I was one of the best; if not the best math student in my school. Inherited it from my dad, so congak became a nature to me. I lost interest in mental arithmetic which caused me to skip tuition and spent my two hours in playground having Maggi Ayam instant with my friend instead.
Dear Allah, please let my daughters be so much better than me.
Anyhow, I have always thought mental arithmetic is useful. Was sooo happy attending the class with Puan Lina's aura; please please please go. I had so much fun.
Having said that, let me give you an overview on how to introduce mental arithmetic for your kids.
You need an abacus; train them with abacus first before they can do mental arithmetic.
The most common abacus is split into two basic rows:
the top row for the "5"s, and
the bottom row for the "ones".
Use index finger to slide the top rows and your thumb to slide the bottom rows.
I will update the next step. Till then, doakan for the strength for me to write more often!
Thursday, March 12, 2015
Ibrah surah Yusuf Perspektif Parenting - a review
Recently, I went to two different talks by two different speakers. Talk number 1 is a two day event, while talk number 2 is an hour event.
I found it ironic on how an hour talk provided me with more contents than a two days talk.
And even more ironic on how a supposedly 2 days motivational talk left me unmotivated and judged. :( Shall not talk about that, but if you're a motivational speaker reading this.. please be careful when you're joking demoralisingly, because people listen to you.
Anyhow, this afternoon, I went to Bangi gateway and I must thank mama yaya zone for the effort, it is totally free, such kindness. Thank you Ustaz Syaari, Subhanallah.. such a good speaker as always, I can't even..
...
Ustaz started his talk with the needs of understanding the Quran. Not only for parenting, but for everything in our life, treat it as our hidayah. Try to read the meaning of each surah and think what is the significance of each line to us. And if we suddenly heard a surah, try to think that Allah SWT is telling us something through the surah. Go back and read the meaning of that surah.
The specialty of Surah Yusuf is that Prophet Yusuf is the only Prophet that has a special surah in the Quran. Also, he is the only Prophet whose story has been told since he was born until the end of his life.
Some points captured from the seminar as has been enlightened by Ustaz Syaari:
1. From Surah Yusuf : 7
Iman tidak diwarisi. Prophet Yusuf's father, grandfather and great grandfather were all Prophets. Yet, look at his brothers. Meaning to say that, after the kids baligh, then it is beyond our control. We could just give the best, try our all and later on, pray and redha.
2. From Surah As Safaat : 102
And when he reached with him [the age of] exertion, he said, "O my son, indeed I have seen in a dream that I [must] sacrifice you, so see what you think." He said, "O my father, do as you are commanded. You will find me, if Allah wills, of the steadfast."
On how Prophet Ibrahim asked for the child's opinion. Even he, a Prophet himself asked for the son's opinion although he obviously not in need to do so.
3. From Surah Hud : 46
He said, "O Noah, indeed he is not of your family; indeed, he is [one whose] work was other than righteous, so ask Me not for that about which you have no knowledge. Indeed, I advise you, lest you be among the ignorant."
On how Allah SWT tells Prophet Noh that his own son is indeed not of his family because the son is among the ignorant.
1. Be a good listener
Surah Yusuf : 4
[Of these stories mention] when Joseph said to his father, "O my father, indeed I have seen [in a dream] eleven stars and the sun and the moon; I saw them prostrating to me."
Although Prophet Yaakob was very very old as compared to Prophet Yusuf who was then 12 years old, it shows that his son did not feel awkward to share with his father about his dream.
2. Call your children with a name that she/he loves
Shall call Khaira, princess now. Kbye.
3. Raise your kids accordingly.
Surah Yusuf : 5
He said, "O my son, do not relate your vision to your brothers or they will contrive against you a plan. Indeed Satan, to man, is a manifest enemy."
On how Prophet Yaakob told his son to not tell the brothers about his dream. It was a good news, the dream was one of the signs that Prophet Yusuf was about to become a prophet. But Prophet Yaakob did not tell that in fear of the son's security.
Moral of the story, treat your kids according to their age, maturity and capability.
4. Look what lies beneath..
Referring to Surah Yusuf : 5 above, how Prophet Yaakob diverts the conversation from talking about the brothers "O my son, do not relate your vision to your brothers or they will contrive against you a plan." to the Satan, "Indeed Satan, to man, is a manifest enemy" shows that our real enemy is not human.
When our kids throw a tantrum, remember, Satan is the enemy. And always study why they throw their tantrum rather than quickly punishing them.
I know, I know, my explanation was not as exciting as I sounded like. Truth is, I am not good in this matter. (Plus I'm hungry, need Nasi though I just ate a couple of hours ago. Seriously, breastfeeding makes me eat like a Giant) The real explanation, is wayyyy beyonddddddddd.. Like, seriously.
So, go! Tomorrow :)
I found it ironic on how an hour talk provided me with more contents than a two days talk.
And even more ironic on how a supposedly 2 days motivational talk left me unmotivated and judged. :( Shall not talk about that, but if you're a motivational speaker reading this.. please be careful when you're joking demoralisingly, because people listen to you.
Anyhow, this afternoon, I went to Bangi gateway and I must thank mama yaya zone for the effort, it is totally free, such kindness. Thank you Ustaz Syaari, Subhanallah.. such a good speaker as always, I can't even..
...
Ustaz started his talk with the needs of understanding the Quran. Not only for parenting, but for everything in our life, treat it as our hidayah. Try to read the meaning of each surah and think what is the significance of each line to us. And if we suddenly heard a surah, try to think that Allah SWT is telling us something through the surah. Go back and read the meaning of that surah.
The specialty of Surah Yusuf is that Prophet Yusuf is the only Prophet that has a special surah in the Quran. Also, he is the only Prophet whose story has been told since he was born until the end of his life.
Some points captured from the seminar as has been enlightened by Ustaz Syaari:
1. From Surah Yusuf : 7
Iman tidak diwarisi. Prophet Yusuf's father, grandfather and great grandfather were all Prophets. Yet, look at his brothers. Meaning to say that, after the kids baligh, then it is beyond our control. We could just give the best, try our all and later on, pray and redha.
2. From Surah As Safaat : 102
And when he reached with him [the age of] exertion, he said, "O my son, indeed I have seen in a dream that I [must] sacrifice you, so see what you think." He said, "O my father, do as you are commanded. You will find me, if Allah wills, of the steadfast."
On how Prophet Ibrahim asked for the child's opinion. Even he, a Prophet himself asked for the son's opinion although he obviously not in need to do so.
3. From Surah Hud : 46
He said, "O Noah, indeed he is not of your family; indeed, he is [one whose] work was other than righteous, so ask Me not for that about which you have no knowledge. Indeed, I advise you, lest you be among the ignorant."
On how Allah SWT tells Prophet Noh that his own son is indeed not of his family because the son is among the ignorant.
The 4 out of 10 principles in raising your children
1. Be a good listener
Surah Yusuf : 4
[Of these stories mention] when Joseph said to his father, "O my father, indeed I have seen [in a dream] eleven stars and the sun and the moon; I saw them prostrating to me."
Although Prophet Yaakob was very very old as compared to Prophet Yusuf who was then 12 years old, it shows that his son did not feel awkward to share with his father about his dream.
2. Call your children with a name that she/he loves
Shall call Khaira, princess now. Kbye.
3. Raise your kids accordingly.
Surah Yusuf : 5
He said, "O my son, do not relate your vision to your brothers or they will contrive against you a plan. Indeed Satan, to man, is a manifest enemy."
On how Prophet Yaakob told his son to not tell the brothers about his dream. It was a good news, the dream was one of the signs that Prophet Yusuf was about to become a prophet. But Prophet Yaakob did not tell that in fear of the son's security.
Moral of the story, treat your kids according to their age, maturity and capability.
4. Look what lies beneath..
Referring to Surah Yusuf : 5 above, how Prophet Yaakob diverts the conversation from talking about the brothers "O my son, do not relate your vision to your brothers or they will contrive against you a plan." to the Satan, "Indeed Satan, to man, is a manifest enemy" shows that our real enemy is not human.
When our kids throw a tantrum, remember, Satan is the enemy. And always study why they throw their tantrum rather than quickly punishing them.
I know, I know, my explanation was not as exciting as I sounded like. Truth is, I am not good in this matter. (Plus I'm hungry, need Nasi though I just ate a couple of hours ago. Seriously, breastfeeding makes me eat like a Giant) The real explanation, is wayyyy beyonddddddddd.. Like, seriously.
So, go! Tomorrow :)
Sunday, February 8, 2015
Fast reading technique (Little Caliph) seminar - A review
Last Friday, when I picked Lil K from school, the teacher came to me excitedly and said.. "Khaira dah pandai baca dua sukukata dah."
I stunned.
"Na.ma. Sa.ya. Su.ka," The teacher further explained.
"Ohhh..." Was the only syllable that managed to escape my mouth. It was just February, and she had a week off last two weeks due to viral fever. Only four weeks in school (plus adjusting herself with new environment, first time being away from family) left me speechless.
"She is one of the advanced student in my class," the teacher added, beaming proudly and I finally smiled.
Too many things in my mind. I never taught her A, B, C. I struggled finding time everyday teaching her hijaiyah. Now she mastered fathah, dhammah, qasrah, huruf sambung and tanwin. In 10th surahs now. Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah. No, never taught her A, B, C at all.
Called Love and he reminded me, "It's true, when akhirat is the one we're aiming for, Allah SWT gives us the dunia for Khaira. How hard learning hijaiyah for her, makes A, B, C as easy as apple picking".
On Sunday, we attended a "Fast reading technique" seminar organized by Khaira's LC. They allowed one adult for each student with the price of RM30. I literally begged her teacher to allow both of us to be there and we paid RM60 first before she could even give us the confirmation. #Clingycouple.
The seminar started 45 minutes late, and we came half an hour early. Imagine the wait.. not a good start.
But, ended up so well. Highly recommended ok, please goooo!!!
Do you know that at the age of 0 to 9, kids learn using both brains? And from 0 to 5 they absorb as much as 80% of what they learn? Like sponges, these kids. And that from 0 to 5, they progressed according to month of birth. Kids born in early of the year learn faster than the end of the year. K was born in October.
Basically, the LC method starts by first teaching them to read in Malay, then English and finally Jawi. They teach these languages via Phonics. They have their own reasoning and logic behind. So, please go and listen to their explanations.
And they treat each word as a picture of sound. They associate each word as action.
a - hysterical 'a'
ba - bouncing the ball
ca - caca dancing
da - playing drum
fa - flower
ga - shaking
ha - like "ha.. ha.. tak tau" like that.
ja - janggut (beard)
ka - laugh as in "ka.. ka.. ka.."
la - singing "la.. la.. la.."
ma - "mmmm maaa.. delicious, Alhamdulillah" *
na - pukul nyamuk
pa - candle blowing
ra - driving motorcycle
sa - snake
ta - shooting people
va - driving van
wa - crying
ya - "yahooo! Alhamdulillah" *
za - bees
*See how they integrate Islam as much as possible?
I always asked Khaira what she learned in school. Her answer would always be, "colouring, playing". To be honest, I am ok with it. Come on.. she is just 4. But actually she learned via playing. So, she thought it was just playing.
For example, the teachers would put the words at the floor and asked them to pick up the letter by saying something like, "Khaira, run like a cheetah and give me a 'ma'". Seriously how funnn??? Or they would asked them to catch the words using something ala2 joran. Cool ok!
They also have individual reading. Not forgetting, stickers everytime they finish reading. No wonder she is sooo obsessed with sticker. Rewards everywhere. Hand clapping, so funn!!
After learning all these, then only they would learn other vowels like "bi, bu, be, bo". They learn these by associating the "ba" with other vowels. One of the way is the Ulat Bulu song.
"Ada Sang Ulat Bulu
Punya kaki seribu
Siapa nampak kakiku
Jikalau tak nampak
Terpaksa ku melompat
Denagn kakiku kurang satu"
So they need to change this song to other vowels. For example..
"Idi Sing Ilit Bili, Pinyi kiki siribi.."
Make sense? No, and according to the speaker, the more ridiculous it is, the easier it is to stick in their mind.
Afterwards, they will learn to make sense of the words they are reading.
"Sa.Ya. Su. Ka. Ba. Ca" is actually "Saya suka baca," you know. All that.
Then they would learn huruf tertutup.
"Sa. Yu. R" is "Sayur"
Then... English. And Hijaiyah.
LC teach only small letters first because they are more common. Anddd, surprise, surprise.. they said, city kids are harder to write (too many tablets, fine motor skills needs to be stimulated). Khaira now, can write Alif, Ba, Ta and all slowly. Like I said, I did not teach her other than Hijaiyah and hafazan at home. Tapi lepas ni, kena kerja lebih keras.
After the seminar, I tried reading some stuff with K, and yup, Alhamdulillah.. so fast, she got almost all correct, just needs to work on her "ba" and "da". A bit confusing.
All in all, the teachers must have done a good job, only Allah SWT can repay their kindness.
Having said that, I have no regrets sending K to LC regardless of her traumatic first day experience. I am a lecturer myself. And the first rule, on the very first day I taught in my class, I would always say to them, "Have faith in me. I won't disappoint you. I would teach you as accurately as possible, kalau ada tersilap sekalipun, I would rectify as soon as I could. The moment you don't have faith in me is the moment it would ruin this course."
It's true.
And with clear conscience, hati ikhlas full of trust, in your hands teachers, I'm putting my "life" kain putih bersih for you to shape, to train this caliph, this little hafizah to be someone to contribute to the Muslim society. Not only to excel in her exam, no, but to contribute to the human beings, in shaa Allah.
In you teachers, I have faith :) And to you, dear Allah SWT, I let her go.
I stunned.
"Na.ma. Sa.ya. Su.ka," The teacher further explained.
"Ohhh..." Was the only syllable that managed to escape my mouth. It was just February, and she had a week off last two weeks due to viral fever. Only four weeks in school (plus adjusting herself with new environment, first time being away from family) left me speechless.
"She is one of the advanced student in my class," the teacher added, beaming proudly and I finally smiled.
Too many things in my mind. I never taught her A, B, C. I struggled finding time everyday teaching her hijaiyah. Now she mastered fathah, dhammah, qasrah, huruf sambung and tanwin. In 10th surahs now. Alhamdulillah, alhamdulillah. No, never taught her A, B, C at all.
Called Love and he reminded me, "It's true, when akhirat is the one we're aiming for, Allah SWT gives us the dunia for Khaira. How hard learning hijaiyah for her, makes A, B, C as easy as apple picking".
On Sunday, we attended a "Fast reading technique" seminar organized by Khaira's LC. They allowed one adult for each student with the price of RM30. I literally begged her teacher to allow both of us to be there and we paid RM60 first before she could even give us the confirmation. #Clingycouple.
The seminar started 45 minutes late, and we came half an hour early. Imagine the wait.. not a good start.
But, ended up so well. Highly recommended ok, please goooo!!!
Do you know that at the age of 0 to 9, kids learn using both brains? And from 0 to 5 they absorb as much as 80% of what they learn? Like sponges, these kids. And that from 0 to 5, they progressed according to month of birth. Kids born in early of the year learn faster than the end of the year. K was born in October.
Basically, the LC method starts by first teaching them to read in Malay, then English and finally Jawi. They teach these languages via Phonics. They have their own reasoning and logic behind. So, please go and listen to their explanations.
And they treat each word as a picture of sound. They associate each word as action.
a - hysterical 'a'
ba - bouncing the ball
ca - caca dancing
da - playing drum
fa - flower
ga - shaking
ha - like "ha.. ha.. tak tau" like that.
ja - janggut (beard)
ka - laugh as in "ka.. ka.. ka.."
la - singing "la.. la.. la.."
ma - "mmmm maaa.. delicious, Alhamdulillah" *
na - pukul nyamuk
pa - candle blowing
ra - driving motorcycle
sa - snake
ta - shooting people
va - driving van
wa - crying
ya - "yahooo! Alhamdulillah" *
za - bees
*See how they integrate Islam as much as possible?
I always asked Khaira what she learned in school. Her answer would always be, "colouring, playing". To be honest, I am ok with it. Come on.. she is just 4. But actually she learned via playing. So, she thought it was just playing.
For example, the teachers would put the words at the floor and asked them to pick up the letter by saying something like, "Khaira, run like a cheetah and give me a 'ma'". Seriously how funnn??? Or they would asked them to catch the words using something ala2 joran. Cool ok!
They also have individual reading. Not forgetting, stickers everytime they finish reading. No wonder she is sooo obsessed with sticker. Rewards everywhere. Hand clapping, so funn!!
After learning all these, then only they would learn other vowels like "bi, bu, be, bo". They learn these by associating the "ba" with other vowels. One of the way is the Ulat Bulu song.
"Ada Sang Ulat Bulu
Punya kaki seribu
Siapa nampak kakiku
Jikalau tak nampak
Terpaksa ku melompat
Denagn kakiku kurang satu"
So they need to change this song to other vowels. For example..
"Idi Sing Ilit Bili, Pinyi kiki siribi.."
Make sense? No, and according to the speaker, the more ridiculous it is, the easier it is to stick in their mind.
Afterwards, they will learn to make sense of the words they are reading.
"Sa.Ya. Su. Ka. Ba. Ca" is actually "Saya suka baca," you know. All that.
Then they would learn huruf tertutup.
"Sa. Yu. R" is "Sayur"
Then... English. And Hijaiyah.
LC teach only small letters first because they are more common. Anddd, surprise, surprise.. they said, city kids are harder to write (too many tablets, fine motor skills needs to be stimulated). Khaira now, can write Alif, Ba, Ta and all slowly. Like I said, I did not teach her other than Hijaiyah and hafazan at home. Tapi lepas ni, kena kerja lebih keras.
After the seminar, I tried reading some stuff with K, and yup, Alhamdulillah.. so fast, she got almost all correct, just needs to work on her "ba" and "da". A bit confusing.
All in all, the teachers must have done a good job, only Allah SWT can repay their kindness.
Having said that, I have no regrets sending K to LC regardless of her traumatic first day experience. I am a lecturer myself. And the first rule, on the very first day I taught in my class, I would always say to them, "Have faith in me. I won't disappoint you. I would teach you as accurately as possible, kalau ada tersilap sekalipun, I would rectify as soon as I could. The moment you don't have faith in me is the moment it would ruin this course."
It's true.
And with clear conscience, hati ikhlas full of trust, in your hands teachers, I'm putting my "life" kain putih bersih for you to shape, to train this caliph, this little hafizah to be someone to contribute to the Muslim society. Not only to excel in her exam, no, but to contribute to the human beings, in shaa Allah.
In you teachers, I have faith :) And to you, dear Allah SWT, I let her go.
Tuesday, October 14, 2014
The PAO method
The best thing about maternity leave is that you got to watch a lot of tvs. While nursing, while both of them were sleeping. Fun fun fun!
I kind of have these sick obsession with aliens and serial killers, so while scrolling over 551 onwards, disappointed not to find Anicent Aliens on air, I stopped at Discovery channel. A program called 'Redesign my brain'.
This story is about a tv personality that undergoes a brain training and I somehow interested with one simple memorization technique called PAO method for you to ease up your memorization technique. PAO stands for Person Action Object. Previously, I shared the memorization techniques I learned from Puan Lina's short course, read here. Perhaps this can be the addendum.
It is very simple actually.
Let's say I give you a card; Ace of Spades. How to remember it with PAO method is like this..
Firstly, look at the initial. A for Ace and S for Spades.
Think of a person with that initial.. For example Adam Sandler.
One of the movie he acted in is Happy Gilmore where he was a golfer there.
So the action is playing.
And the object is golf ball.
It sticks in your mind easier when you visualize. So with the PAO method, it helps your brain to visualize.
Simple sharing. But I hope it helps.
I kind of have these sick obsession with aliens and serial killers, so while scrolling over 551 onwards, disappointed not to find Anicent Aliens on air, I stopped at Discovery channel. A program called 'Redesign my brain'.
This story is about a tv personality that undergoes a brain training and I somehow interested with one simple memorization technique called PAO method for you to ease up your memorization technique. PAO stands for Person Action Object. Previously, I shared the memorization techniques I learned from Puan Lina's short course, read here. Perhaps this can be the addendum.
It is very simple actually.
Let's say I give you a card; Ace of Spades. How to remember it with PAO method is like this..
Firstly, look at the initial. A for Ace and S for Spades.
Think of a person with that initial.. For example Adam Sandler.
One of the movie he acted in is Happy Gilmore where he was a golfer there.
So the action is playing.
And the object is golf ball.
It sticks in your mind easier when you visualize. So with the PAO method, it helps your brain to visualize.
Simple sharing. But I hope it helps.
Friday, September 26, 2014
My role model
About 2 years ago, a friend invited me to a talk via email. Funny story though, she pasted the link wrongly. So I registered myself to a different talk instead.
I took it as a way Allah swt wanted to introduce me to a wonderful lady, Puan Lina Karim and later on she became my role model.
See, I wasn't the most 'fun' person to be with. I hate roller coaster, twister or any kind of that 'fun'. I can't even look at my nieces and nephews playing around together. Macam nak kena heart attack. So lasak. I just can't.
And ohh myyy.. Who would have thought my daughter was born super handful. Mom would shout hysterically every now and then. Me? When it's her hyper time I would just call Love and said, "I can't handle this" and walk away. It was too scary to watch. And it was obviously too annoying for both Love and K.
Then, I came across Puan Lina's blogpost that seriously make me feel a lottt calmer and better. Read all about it here.
About the 3 types of mom you could be when your children get handful.
To Puan Lina Karim.. thank you for all the inspiring talks and posts. And making me feel that someone so ordinary like me can produce extra ordinary generations. May Allah swt bless you and your family always.
I took it as a way Allah swt wanted to introduce me to a wonderful lady, Puan Lina Karim and later on she became my role model.
See, I wasn't the most 'fun' person to be with. I hate roller coaster, twister or any kind of that 'fun'. I can't even look at my nieces and nephews playing around together. Macam nak kena heart attack. So lasak. I just can't.
And ohh myyy.. Who would have thought my daughter was born super handful. Mom would shout hysterically every now and then. Me? When it's her hyper time I would just call Love and said, "I can't handle this" and walk away. It was too scary to watch. And it was obviously too annoying for both Love and K.
Then, I came across Puan Lina's blogpost that seriously make me feel a lottt calmer and better. Read all about it here.
About the 3 types of mom you could be when your children get handful.
I am obviously Mom no. 2. I want to be Mom no. 3.
It takes a lot of effort. Pray for me. In shaa Allah. Ameen. The only way is forward.
To Puan Lina Karim.. thank you for all the inspiring talks and posts. And making me feel that someone so ordinary like me can produce extra ordinary generations. May Allah swt bless you and your family always.
Tuesday, September 9, 2014
100 ways to be kind to your child
Article is copied from http://creativewithkids.com/100-ways-to-be-kind-to-your-child/
Tell your child:
1. I love you.
2. I love you no matter what.
3. I love you even when you are angry at me.
4. I love you even when I am angry with you.
5. I love you when you are far way. My love for you can reach you wherever you are.
6. If I could pick any 4 year old (5 year old, 6 year old…) in the whole wide world, I’d pick you.
7. I love you to the moon and then around the stars and back again.
8. Thank you.
9. I enjoyed playing with you today.
10. My favorite part of the day was when I was with you and we _______.
Share:
11. The story of their birth or adoption.
12. About how you cuddled them when they were a baby.
13. The story of their name.
14. A story about yourself when you were their age.
15. The story of how their grandparents met.
16. What your favorite color is.
17. That sometimes you struggle too.
18. That when you’re holding hands and you give three squeezes, it’s a secret code that means, “I love you”.
19. What the plan is.
20. What you’re doing right now.
Play:
21. Charades
22. Hop Scotch
23. Board Games
24. Hide & Seek
25. Simon Says
26. Twenty Questions
27. I Spy on long car rides
28. Catch
Pretend:
29. To catch their kiss and put it on your cheek.
30. That their tickle tank is empty and you have to fill it.
31. That their high five is so powerful it nearly knocks you over.
32. That you are super ticklish.
33. That you are explorers in the amazing world of your own backyard.
34. That it’s party day!
Try:
35. To get enough sleep.
36. To drink enough water.
37. To eat decent food.
38. Dressing in a way that makes you feel confident and comfortable.
39. Calling a friend the next time you feel like you are about to lose it with the kids.
40. Giving a gentle touch to show approval.
41. Dancing in the kitchen.
42. To get your kids to bop to the music with you in the car.
43. Showing your kids that you can do a somersault or handstand or a cartwheel.
44. Keeping the sigh to yourself.
45. Using a kind voice, even if you have to fake it.
Read:
46. A book of silly poems.
47. A story and then act out the plot.
48. Your favorite childhood book to them.
49. When the afternoon is starting to go astray.
50. Outside under a tree.
51. In the library kids corner.
52. The comic book they love that you’re not so hot on.
53. About age appropriate behavior so you can keep your expectations realistic.
Listen:
54. To your child in the car.
55. To silly songs together.
56. For that question that means your child really needs your input.
57. One second longer than you think you have patience for.
58. For the feelings behind your child’s words.
Ask:
59. Why do you think that happens?
60. What do you think would happen if______?
61. How shall we find out?
62. What are you thinking about?
63. What was your favorite part of the day?
64. What do you think this tastes like?
Show:
65. Your child how to do something instead of banning them from it.
66. How to whistle with a blade of grass.
67. How to shuffle cards- make a bridge if you can!
68. How to cut food.
69. How to fold laundry.
70. How to look up information when you don’t know the answer.
71. Affection to your spouse.
72. That taking care of yourself is important.
Take Time:
73. To watch construction sites.
74. To look at the birds.
75. To let your child pour ingredients into the bowl.
76. To walk places together.
77. To dig in the dirt together.
78. To do a task at your child’s pace.
79. To just sit with your child while they play.
Trust:
80. That your child is capable.
81. That you are the right parent for your child.
82. That you are enough.
83. That you can do what is right for your family.
Delight:
84. Clean your child’s room as a surprise.
85. Put chocolate chips in the pancakes.
86. Put a love note in their lunch.
87. Make their snack into a smiley face shape.
88. Make sound effects while you help them do something.
89. Sit on the floor with them to play.
Let Go:
90. Of the guilt.
91. Of how you thought it was going to be.
92. Of your need to be right.
Give:
93. A kind look.
94. A smile when your child walks into the room.
95. A kind touch back when your child touches you.
96. The chance to connect before you correct so that your child can actually hear your words.
97. Your child a chance to work out their frustrations before helping them.
98. A bath when the day feels long.
99. A hug.
100. You get to choose the next one! What is your favorite way to be kind to your child?
Tell your child:
1. I love you.
2. I love you no matter what.
3. I love you even when you are angry at me.
4. I love you even when I am angry with you.
5. I love you when you are far way. My love for you can reach you wherever you are.
6. If I could pick any 4 year old (5 year old, 6 year old…) in the whole wide world, I’d pick you.
7. I love you to the moon and then around the stars and back again.
8. Thank you.
9. I enjoyed playing with you today.
10. My favorite part of the day was when I was with you and we _______.
Share:
11. The story of their birth or adoption.
12. About how you cuddled them when they were a baby.
13. The story of their name.
14. A story about yourself when you were their age.
15. The story of how their grandparents met.
16. What your favorite color is.
17. That sometimes you struggle too.
18. That when you’re holding hands and you give three squeezes, it’s a secret code that means, “I love you”.
19. What the plan is.
20. What you’re doing right now.
Play:
21. Charades
22. Hop Scotch
23. Board Games
24. Hide & Seek
25. Simon Says
26. Twenty Questions
27. I Spy on long car rides
28. Catch
Pretend:
29. To catch their kiss and put it on your cheek.
30. That their tickle tank is empty and you have to fill it.
31. That their high five is so powerful it nearly knocks you over.
32. That you are super ticklish.
33. That you are explorers in the amazing world of your own backyard.
34. That it’s party day!
Try:
35. To get enough sleep.
36. To drink enough water.
37. To eat decent food.
38. Dressing in a way that makes you feel confident and comfortable.
39. Calling a friend the next time you feel like you are about to lose it with the kids.
40. Giving a gentle touch to show approval.
41. Dancing in the kitchen.
42. To get your kids to bop to the music with you in the car.
43. Showing your kids that you can do a somersault or handstand or a cartwheel.
44. Keeping the sigh to yourself.
45. Using a kind voice, even if you have to fake it.
Read:
46. A book of silly poems.
47. A story and then act out the plot.
48. Your favorite childhood book to them.
49. When the afternoon is starting to go astray.
50. Outside under a tree.
51. In the library kids corner.
52. The comic book they love that you’re not so hot on.
53. About age appropriate behavior so you can keep your expectations realistic.
Listen:
54. To your child in the car.
55. To silly songs together.
56. For that question that means your child really needs your input.
57. One second longer than you think you have patience for.
58. For the feelings behind your child’s words.
Ask:
59. Why do you think that happens?
60. What do you think would happen if______?
61. How shall we find out?
62. What are you thinking about?
63. What was your favorite part of the day?
64. What do you think this tastes like?
Show:
65. Your child how to do something instead of banning them from it.
66. How to whistle with a blade of grass.
67. How to shuffle cards- make a bridge if you can!
68. How to cut food.
69. How to fold laundry.
70. How to look up information when you don’t know the answer.
71. Affection to your spouse.
72. That taking care of yourself is important.
Take Time:
73. To watch construction sites.
74. To look at the birds.
75. To let your child pour ingredients into the bowl.
76. To walk places together.
77. To dig in the dirt together.
78. To do a task at your child’s pace.
79. To just sit with your child while they play.
Trust:
80. That your child is capable.
81. That you are the right parent for your child.
82. That you are enough.
83. That you can do what is right for your family.
Delight:
84. Clean your child’s room as a surprise.
85. Put chocolate chips in the pancakes.
86. Put a love note in their lunch.
87. Make their snack into a smiley face shape.
88. Make sound effects while you help them do something.
89. Sit on the floor with them to play.
Let Go:
90. Of the guilt.
91. Of how you thought it was going to be.
92. Of your need to be right.
Give:
93. A kind look.
94. A smile when your child walks into the room.
95. A kind touch back when your child touches you.
96. The chance to connect before you correct so that your child can actually hear your words.
97. Your child a chance to work out their frustrations before helping them.
98. A bath when the day feels long.
99. A hug.
100. You get to choose the next one! What is your favorite way to be kind to your child?
Subscribe to:
Comments (Atom)