Birthday party for K and A

So, guess which outlet did the girls request for their birthday party this year?

Yuppp, KFC again (T_T). Third year here guys.. tak boring ke? I suggested A&W, Pizza Hut, all lah except McD, but it's their day. So, we obliged.

But, this year.. Khaira is a bit shy. She is no longer interested with the games and all.

Next year, tempat lain please?!

Thank you to all our families and friends!

Khaira turns 7!

Khaira is 7, guysssss!! 😭😭😭 It has been 7 years since I became a mom. Soon she’ll become a teenager, then to uni and have a family of her own.

As usual we celebrated her birthday at school. I love having a birthday cake resembling their interest at that time, and this year Khaira was obsessed with Powerpuff Girls. The irony, I used to be obsessed with them during my time.

2018 is another tough year for Khaira. Firstly, she had to stay at school from 750am to 4pm, or even 6pm when she had Tae Kwon Do. Her separation anxiety got worse, it took her 3 months to adjust. Then, her first time taking examination. She got so nervous and just about when she managed to control her emotions better, her diagnosis was confirmed. She has asthma and on inhaler after years of monitoring.

This year she struggled with being bullied, struggled with girls issue; kawan tak kawan. And I have always been there to protect her. Until today, my friend advised me and said, "they need to learn to feel sad and handle their own problem". She couldn't be more correct.

But all, in all.. I am very proud of you, Khaira Asyikin. You cope with everything well. She won multiple awards this year. Everytime I asked her on what she wants as a reward, her answer went from Buku Rampaian, to some stuff in kedai RM2. Very low maintenance this one!

I love you and I always will, K. Although you need to fight your own battle sometimes, I'm right behind you always ok. Always remember that k, my love. You're adaptable and strong!

Khaira in Standard 1

Finding school for Khaira was not an easy task for us. I started looking for one since she was 4.

First, we discussed whether to send her to Sekolah Kebangsaan (SK) or private school. International school was not an option for us. Too expensive, might as well save for her university later on.

Both Love and I are very pro of SK as both of us were from there. I have faith in the system, the teachers, the facilities. I believe no private school can beat that. But, our priority is for her to be in an islamic environment. Having said that, we need to send her to KAFA. And thinking about her transportation and transit, we decided to send her to private school instead.

After thorough consideration, we filtered out to two options: SRITI Bangi or SRI ABIM. SRITI is a tahfiz school. We extremely love the syllabus, but not the facilities. It is a shop lot. Khaira took the exam and she loved the school a lot.

Still on mask as her lung was still recovering

SRI ABIM on the other hand was initially just a backup for us, it is an islamic school, not tahfiz. But, the moment Khaira did her exam there, we fell in love immediately. It was systematic and well organized, we loved the environment and it just felt right. It has the feel of SK there, though K preferred SRITI and she said ABIM's entry exam was too easy, she felt SRITI can challenge her intellectual better.

We reached to our final decision when K's paed was telling us that K should avoid air cond as her lung was still recovering at that time. That made our life easier. Convincing K was an easy task, she is still at the age where she pretty much still know that we only wanted the best for her.

Her first couple of months, as expected has not been easy at all. She hated to be away from home for such long hours (7.50 am - 4 pm).

On Mondays and Thursdays, she had her Tae Kwon Do class, after school until 6pm which got her separation anxiety really badly. Plus, no Std 1 girl was enrolled to the class other than her. So, recently, we skipped her class on Thursdays, make it just once a week. So, all is well.

She recently got a Yellow belt. I pray so she had the perseverance to achieve black belt, unlike me. (I stopped at Blue belt).

She did extremely well at school. She is the class assistant monitor. She aimed to be a prefect (so unlike me, I hated prefect. But I was one in primary, I don't know why).

Her academic, Alhamdulillah was well. She recently became the top in her darjah.

And when I asked what present would she like, her answer was Buku Rampaian. A one ringgit buku rampaian. (T_T)

But most of all, I am very happy that since she is in SRI ABIM, she would not go out without her tudung anymore. Though, we need to revamp her wardrobe, it's a good problem. I hope soon, she would take care of her solat, in shaa Allah. Baby steps.

Smart IQ: Power Brain for Children - A review

Last December, I sent Khaira for a Power Brain course for children in Smart IQ, Bangi. It was a two days full day course followed by 4 classes afterwards.

Power Brain is a training method where you fully utilize your brain capability to improve focus, memory and creativity. It was said that we are only using 10% of our brain capacity most of the time, so this method helps you utilize more. It wakes up your other senses, if previously we use only eyes/vision most of the time, Power Brain helps you encourage your touch, hearing, taste and smell sensors.

My verdict?

I'll let you judge for me.

This was what Khaira has achieved at the end of the first day.

This was at the end of the second day.

And now, Alhamdulillah, she could do much more. She could even read Quran blindfold. Not only hands, her feet have been sensing more accurately. We are still trying hard to increase the accuracy of her front and back sonar. Soon, in shaa Allah.

This is some of the sharing I managed to type in during the class.

- Kalau tak confident, bakat tak keluar
- Congratulate effort, hug
- Acknowledge and highlight benda baik
- Small change must be acknowledged
- Enhanced from normal to super sensory
- Sense vibration of colours, tangan lebih sensitive, hidung lebih sensitive
- Mata banyak distraction, anak susah fokus
- Focus point differs from one kid to the other, according to VAK
- Besarkan memory, connect cells
- Tutup mata, mudah simpan and retrieve info
- Kalau salah, try again. Bangkit from kesalahan and kepayahan: AQ
- Takut kena marah. Eg. Panjat pagar, say “careful, tangan kena kuat”. To inform that they are in risky situation

- Exercise:
- 1. Tangan kiri peace, tangan kanan pistol, then swap. Bayangkan. Nak sampaikan info, bayangkan. Jangan ada negative thoughts. Absorption kuat. Sebelum ajar, mandi and wudhuk.
- 2. Genggam penumbuk, ibu jari kanan dengan jari manis kanan satu arah, then switch.
- 3. Satu tangan softly tepuk kepala kat atas (must touch) satu lagi pusing kat perut (jangan touch). Then switch. Can even tukar arah. *kalau tulis tekan
- 4. Satu tangan pegang hidung, tangan kat dalam. Satu lagi pegang telinga. Then switch. Can tambah tepuk in between. *kalau susah nk focus
- 5. Satu tangan tumbuk, satu lagi gosok, tapi float, then switch
- 6. Tangan kanan pusing ke depan, tangan kiri pusing ke belakang. Then, switch
- Ideally, can change within 2 weeks. Train everyday

- Food for brain: kismis, kurma, almond
- Kismis 7 biji (kalau budak kecik, less but number ganjil), teknik: kunyah sampai keluar air, then kemam bawah lidah sampai hilang manis, then telan. Bawah lidah banyak nerve sambung ke neurons.
- Hungry/sleepy all the time sbb banyak pakai brain
- Charge energy: minum plain water yg tak sejuk. Jangan minum air sejuk masa belajar. Sebulan no hp game
- 8 jam tido malam.
- Hp drained out energy. Wifi be careful. Malam tutup wifi, jauhkan/matikan hp
- Satu tangan kat dada, satu kat perut, tarik nafas ikut hidung, masuk ke perut, lepas ke mulut, cakap charge energy. Tarik benda positive, buang benda negative. Mesti ada kaler, bila buang kaler hitam
- Jangan lepaskan nafas negative kat depan orang, they will be affected

Leaving the girls for my second umrah trip (T_T)

I remember in 2015, my good friend was telling this every time after solat,

"This year, I want to go for umrah!"

But she didn't make any preparation for that. Come December, her brother in law (BIL) was supposed to go to Umrah, but had to be cancelled due to work, guess who went to replace the BIL and his wife?

Then 2016, this same friend of mine was telling me again, every time after solat,

"This year, I want to go for Hajj!"

Again, she didn't make any preparation and about two months before Hajj, guess who was invited by the Almighty?

One day I asked her, "How?"

"If you want something good bad enough, Allah will help you!" Her level of faith and dependency, I cried!

"I did want it bad enough.." I said.

"What hold you back then?" She asked, smiling. I thought hard. It was the girls. I am one hell of clingy mom, so does my girls. "You have to let go. When you know it is a good thing to do, your niat is for Allah, Allah will take care of them."

I took it to heart.

I let go, sincerely for the first time, let loose, give all the control to Almighty and left them for Umrah for 6 days. And my heart is totally peace in Makkah and Madinah, I missed them. But I wasn't paranoid, it didn't ache.

I am blessed to be constantly reminded by good people surrounding me. Love said, that is also my form of rezeki. Mufti Menk said sometimes, Allah gave a reminder to us via normal people and normal event.

So how was it to leave them?

I told them earlier of my plan, reminded them every day.

Left them love letters, so they could read one by one every day. One side of the letter was coloring page, one side was my notes.

Left them homeworks, day by day.

In return, Khaira made us a box with letters from her day by day as well before we left. It was priceless.

Aisha was crying almost everyday at night before we left, but once we were in Umrah, she was doing ok. Khaira on the other hand was cool and all before we left. But on the day, she cried for half a day. Was inconsolable at the airport.

But, Alhamdulillah for my strong family support. One of my brothers and my SIL took leave to cheer them up. They brought them to Petrosains the next day. My parents in law visited them every now and then at my parents' house. Everything was smooth sailing.

Every day, K would write us letters and send us the photo. A sent some too, but of course, it was just some sketching of something that we could not make sense of.

We would call them everday via Kakao as apparently Whatsapp Call was blocked in Saudi. It was quite difficult to get the sim card as contrary from the previous year. Booths in airport was offline, so we waited until the next day to buy sim card in Makkah. I had to roam for two days.

They would send us videos and pictures and voice messages. This was my favourite!

By day 6, K was already super sad. Cried at night a bit and all, but it was ok, because we reached Malaysia the afternoon of 7th day :)

Alhamdulillah, the longest I left them and the first time both of us were not there. Thank you Alllah for taking care of them while I was gone, and for taking care of them all these while 24/7 :)

Khaira’s kindy graduation

Remember those times when I left K in this one kindy and she had the most miserable time of her life. Quickly she became inteovert until I saw one picture of her, under the table alone while the other kids having the time of their life.

I talked to the teacher and she made a remark saying somewhat like Khaira was always the weird ones. Then, I found Genius Aulad and slowly but surely Khaira gained her confidence back.

It was 2 years and 4 months ago.

Last month, Khaira had her graduation. Her last in Genius Aulad.

A few days before the concert, we received the agenda of the event. 

Love realized that K’s name was in the agenda. She told me she would recite some surahs, I didn’t know she was selected. I couldn’t be prouder. I have been training her to recite surahs since 1. And at 6, she had her first public recitation!

When we arrived, the teacher greeted her with a bouquet of chocolate, and I thought it was really thoughtful.

Khaira together with her classmate, were the emcee for the day. She was so cool on stage, not nervous at all. I was impressed!

Look at how much our girl has improved. If you were to ask me 3 years ago, when I was worried sick looking at her having difficulties socializing, I wouldn’t even dream of getting her to this stage.

I was almost in tears. It is a loonggggg tiring journey for both Love and I and also the teachers to get her to this level. Of course we know it is worth it in the end.

Seeing K in her graduation robe, somehow brings somewhat a relief for me that her first training to socialize, to be a good team player as well as a leader and to be a good student has somewhat completed. I always told the teacher that I am not worried about her academic as she is just six (of course I never for a moment took it for granted), my priority is for her to know how to socialize and differentiate good influences and the not so good ones.

Anyway, right after Khaira was on a month leave when she was infected with mycoplasma, the teacher nominated her for “Cabaran Bijak Membaca 2017” to represent GA Bandar Putra Permai reading challenge among Genius Aulad nationwide.

5 months after, I have totally forgotten about it. But during the ihtifal, the winner was announced and guess what? Alhamdulillah, K won “The Most Sparkling Reader” award!

I was speechless and couldn’t thank the Almighty more.

Her performance with her friends was entertaining. It’s hard to see her leaving her best friends.

And her teachers.

And her cook and her transporter, they are all super nice people, I cried on her last day. So bad.

Thank you Teacher Rozita and all the teachers, Mak Su, Encik Sopi and Encik Mat the transporter. You have all worked together to bring in the confidence in my lil girl, I could have never repay that. I pray may Allah swt bless all of you always.

Khaira Asyikin, one day, I am sure you are going to read this.. remember these people always, keep them in your doa and prayers for we have been blessed with their kindness to get us here. Alhamdulillah.

Khaira turns six!

Can you believe it? My first born turned six on 17th October 2017.

Some of you might be following me since my first hypnobirth story and guess what, it was six years ago.

I feel so humbled and blessed to have been given the chance to raise up such lovely brilliant girl like you, Khaira Asyikin.

We invited our family over for a small birthday party for Khaira and had a small celebration at her school.

She is at the moment obsessed with a cartoon called “The Loud House”.

Previously, she was obsessed with “The Powerpuff Girls” partly because I used to be obsessed with PPG and our bed sheet and decos in my room at my parents’ place are filled with them.

Every year near their birthday I would asked them what they would like to be when they grow up. It’s fun to see the answers getting mature each year. It’s no different this year.

“I want to be a Professor,” was K’s answer. Professor was a big word for a girl her age. She was way too mature than I thought, well at least at that point of time. I thought she was inspired by me, because you know at 32, and at the field where I am, of course my ultimatum in terms of career is to be a professor.

“Do you know why I wanna be a Professor, Ibu?” She asked.

“Why?” I asked her back, grinning.

“Because I wanna create Powerpuff Girls just like Professor Utonium!” She replied excitedly.

(T_T)

Surviving Mycoplasma in Malaysia

With a very heavy heart, I'm pouring myself out in this post, with only one intention.. for those mothers who experienced / are experiencing the same situation as mine to know that you are not alone.

On April, I deactivated my Facebook, my Instagram and most importantly this blog that meant the world to me.. Because I was at the lowest point of my life.

Khaira started to have dry cough back in February, just in time when she was able to swim on her own. Thanks to multiple swimming classes she attended, to Love whom has been training her every week, she made very good progress. No float needed in adult's pool at the age of 5 and we were beaming with pride.

After a week of dry cough, the cough turned into wet coughs. I found the pattern to be weird as normally K would only have dry cough 3 days max, because the nebulizer, steaming and percussion that we did at least three times a day would help changed her dry cough to wet cough faster. After a few days of wet cough she always made full recovery.

A week after wet cough with no sign of recovery, we sent her to Dr. Nadhir. Two weeks after her cough changed from wet to slightly dry but no sign of recovery and again off to Dr. Nadhir. A week and no progress, I started to panic.

So I tried homeopathy as it usually worked for her and everyday of Sonotron. After every session of Sonotron, she would discharge lots of phlegms. She could spit her own phlegm at this time, but the phlegm seemed to be ongoing everytime and it scared me a lot.

In between homeopathy and Sonotron, we took blood test and chest xray, GP said she was okay, nothing to worry it could probably just asthma.

My instinct told me it was something else.

I made an appointment with a paed, the moment the doc saw the same xray from the GP's clinic, she showed me that fine thin line that separated K's upper lungs and lower lungs.

"Did she attend any swimming class?"

And the next statement followed.

"I suspected she has Mycoplasma pneumonia from her swimming pool," Paed said and the blood test confirmed.

2 antibiotics and a week later, things were the same. Came back to Paed and guess what, one of the antibiotics given by the Paed was under dosed. (T_T)

Before I knew it, K was warded. First time in her life. A day before my brother's wedding.

6 days of Rosephine + percussion everyday and neb 4 hourly to 6 hourly later, my girl was discharged with having to wear mask in public area. She got better and better Alhamdulillah. Aisha had Mycoplasma too, but because we detected it early, she made full recovery after three weeks with home care.

Me, on the other hand, during K's recovery, I went into depression. Maybe paranoid. Everyday I woke up, I feel at a dark place as if no doctors I could trust anymore. Between misdiagnosed and under dosage of antibiotics and everything that happened in between, I couldn't sleep. I thought of dark thoughts everytime I drove home to and back from work. I cried everyday.

One day it got so bad, I talked to Love and I said I wanted to talk to a psychiatrist. And I meant it. He was concerned and asked me to tell him everything, I did. And I felt better. I don't like talking about something that upsets me, perhaps I held too many feelings inside me it ate me. But I am myself now, Alhamdulillah, I can say I am 98% myself. :)

K on the other hand is making very good progress.

But Mycoplasma held tight to your cell, so every now and then, 4 months after, she still had a minor coughing fit.The rest of the days she would be ok. Doc always comforted me that they are good cough, you don't want to keep the bacteria inside. Only with productive cough the remaining of the dead bacteria are able to get out of the system.

She still on/off home nebulizer, still had her steam, percussion and physio everyday 4 months after.. But she made very good progress.

So mommies, they will recover with Allah's will. It is just a matter of time, have faith and be strong ok. You are not alone, I promise.Through the journey, remember that every tiny things we did matter to the Almighty.

"He who has done an atom's weight of good shall see it" - Al-Zalzala, ayat 7.

K at Globalart

Omg I'm so behind in updating my blog! February has been a super hectic month, but I will try to catch up in my writing in shaa Allah.

Last October, after being somewhat numb as my firstborn turned 5 (how time flies!) followed by being all hormonal looking at her drawings, she just got better and better, Subhanallah, I started to question myself. More stories of her drawings here.

K's simple drawing at 4

A's drawing at 2, also cantik what

Me, being the left brainer as always have never been really encouraging her with all these artsy stuff. She must have gotten that from my dad. I mean, I did not stop her, but the best I did was, "Look at your drawing, so pretttyyyy!" I couldn't imagine doing that for the rest of my life, it would get lame one day.

So that October evening, after I did my research, alone I traveled near my housing area to survey for an art class for her and I fell in love with Globalart immediately. Attended trial class, she loved it and just like that, my Saturday morning started early, no more lazing around the bed.

My worry is just one though, her social skills. Alhamdulillah, she has always been coping well academically, but at 4 she had a traumatized first day at kindy, so it was not easy for her to trust strangers. That was the difficulties we had with her previous swimming classes. Even more, she was the only Malay in her Globalart class. So, I talked to her class teacher and Globalart handled her really well. *salute*

She started with something simple..

To a bit more challenging..

Using crayons and water colour as well..

She made friends with other races, which I am so happy about since in her Kindy, they are only Malays there.

This one particular girl in Globalart caught my girls' attentions most..

K: "Ibu what are you doing in my art class with that monkey?"
A: "Ibu, why are you playing in Kakak's school?"

That is not me (T_T)

Although, in all seriousness, she does look like me at home, with her hair like that (T_T)

All was fun in her Globalart class, she joined for months, and we even participated her in colouring contest and so on. Only recently to discover that..

She doesn't really fancy colouring guys!! She likes drawing :'( In Globalart, they have to master colouring first before drawing, haha! Sorry, baby, noob mommy here!

But, she was still psyched learning something new. This was K, on her first day at 9am on Saturday morning. I looked the exact opposite with my pyjama still, thanks for asking.

After 3 months in Art class, did her colouring improve?

I would say they are pretty much the same.

3 months in Art class was quite pricey. It costs us around RM800, BUT.. it is a skill not me and Love can teach her. We are simply not art people.

To look beyond, it is not just the colouring skills we hope she would pick up.

It's the social skills of mingling with other races, the discipline of listening to instructions, the patience of colouring, the thoroughness of not leaving white space, etc.

Did she become more creative on her drawings or other artsy stuff? Oh yes.

This was what she did for me, a few days ago.. (no reference whatsoever, a quiz and bear in mind she was just 5y4m).

Was it worth it?

For us yes, because I did not spend on her reading, mental arithmetic or mengaji class, those are skills I could teach her at home, and I have been doing that everyday since she was 1. But, not arts or colouring. Let her stimulate her right brain. And if I could spend that much for my facial or car or house etc, why not for my biggest amanah in the world.

Khaira, Aisha, may you grow up well, contributing something to the ummah and aim for jannah. Much love, baby girls!

Baby girl turns 5!

Khaira's obsession to horses and ponies are getting way out of hand, hence the theme this year is obviously, "My Little Pony".

I ordered the cake from #shaeryscake and Shaery suggested me to use the actual figurines so K could use them as toys afterwards. Brilliant!

School has been tough these couple of months for her. Just about she got comfortable with her new teacher, Teacher Maria, she changed to another teacher, Teacher Omi, a guy. She is not comfortable with guys, so just imagine. On top of that, some of the teachers like to turn off the lights to silent the kids after class while waiting for the transport. Drama sekejap, but I must praise Genius Aulad they took my complaints seriously. Unlike the other kindy K used to go.

Anyhow, Happy Birthday my Princess!! Toddler years have been challenging as it is when K's immune system is developing, but Alhamdulillah, only with His will, it is all manageable and she got better and better as her immune system becomes stronger and stronger.

Be healthy baby girl so that you could do more to contribute to Islam. I love you to the moon and back!

The Asyikins' 2016 birthday party

I can't believe it is almost a year since I last wrote about the girls' birthday party in 2015. Read the full story here.

Anyhow, this year we had another celebration for the girls and decided to have it at KFC again. But this time, a bigger KFC as we have bigger crowd. Last year was at Jusco Equine and this year at Jusco Seri Kembangan where they reserved the whole top floor for our guests.

Compared to 2015, I guess the organizer was better last year. And the packaged also has been reduced much more although price is still the same. Cake is no longer included in the package this year, so I had my SIL made one for the girls

Castle cake!

My princess Aisha was super excited about the party and has been practicing her Chicky Dance for days.

But during the party, this Lil Missy slept the wholeeee time! Balik baru kebuluran and excited Chicky Dance sorang2 (T_T) Kesian buah hati!

Khaira was one happy lady berlari non stop and sambung main sampai malam since my cousin dropped by at mom's after the party so her girl could play with my girls.

I can't stop thinking that it was just last year we had the party where my beloved Grandmother was still there. It was saddening, really. I kept thinking about it every now and then during the party, I tried my best to push it away.

And for that, it meant the world.. that my best friend in the whole world dropped by for our party although she had to travel alone with her two girls who were the same age as mine. One super lady, I could not imagine doing that on my own.

Only God knows how much I love these girls!

I read from iMuslim, a lesson on Gratitude from Surah Ibrahim.. I guess lemme just share it with you here..

You can't have patience until you have gratitude. Of course I wish my Grandmom was still there this year for the girls' birthday party, in fact I wish she is with me every day, every year.

But if I can't have that, truly I am very thankful for those around me.

Our relatives, most of them are there for the girls. My super busy uncle, even my Korean aunt all the way from Korea.

My SABians friends; the ones whom I know 14 years ago, whom with me through thick and thin.

Love's friends since kindy..

The parents had fun..

As well as obviously the kids..

 My girls obviously were psyched whether at KFC or lampi at home. Nonetheless, thank you EVERYONE (mentioned or not, in pics or not) obviously it matters to us. Perhaps the only time we get to meet nowadays. I hope this is not the last time all of us gather together.

Lots of love, Kapal and the Asyikins.

Al fatihah to arwah Grandmom.