TIP POWER PARENTING
Third Session: Dr Tengku Asmadi
Education system di Malaysia tidak membongkar kemahiran anak-anak yg berbeza-beza.
cth : bila ada sebarisan haiwan monyet, gajah, ikan, anjing laut, penguin disuruh memanjat pokok. Dah tentu monyet tersengih lebar sbb mmg kemahiran dia memanjat. sedangkan haiwan lain tercengang je la dengan rasa kecewa.
- tengok kebolehan anak yang berbeza.
ASAS POWER PARENTING
💟agama
💟sahsiah
💟akademik
💟skil
💟AGAMA
Nak anak cemerlang
1. jaga waktu solat. solat awal waktu.
2. rajin baca al-quran.
-apabila anak rajin baca quran, anak jadi pintar.
-bila asas agama kukuh Insya Allah, rezeki murah.
Orang sekarang meminang tak tanya kerja apa. Mereka tanya boleh jd imam tak?
💟SAHSIAH
Sikap anak datang dari rumah
40% ibu bapa
60% guru, rakan, media
Jangan tonjolkan kelemahan kita depan anak.
cth: jgn kata negatif pun depan anak. spt merungut bila kita tak boleh buat sesuatu.
Hati2 apa kita buat. anak ikut.
Hati2 apa kita cakap. anak ikut.
Bila anak duduk sebelah kita. Dia tangkap/rekod apa yg dia nampak.
cth; bapa biasa suke ckp b*** bila sedang marah. terutamanya semasa memandu kereta bila ada kereta lain memotong. anak yang di sebelah tengok dan rekod. Itu yg dicakap nanti.
💟AKADEMIK
Hanya ada Akhlak baik, jujur, amanah tanpa ada ijazah boleh dapat kerja ke?
Boleh dengan berniaga.
Terima hakikat tak semua anak akademik ok.
Walaupun dia tak straight A di dunia, Insya Allah straight A di akhirat.
Jangan terlalu memaksa anak dapat A. sekadar kemampuan mereka.
💟SKILL
Orang ada skill boleh hidup.
Develop skill mereka spy mrk boleh cari rezeki.
cth tukang urut, goreng pisang, melukis, photographer.
Besarkan anak ikut zaman.
🚩Otak yg cerdik dlm usia 7 thn pertama. waktu ni beri pelbagai pendedahan.
🚩Perasaan ingin tahu anak-anak sangat kuat.
🚩Sekiranya dimarah bila mrk bertanya akan membantutkan perasaan ingin tahu mrk.
Statistik PDRM buat kajian anak yg lari dr rumah umur 15-19 thn.
sbb tu usia 8-14 ▶ kena tegas.
usia 15-19▶ jadikan mrk kawan. tegur cara baik.
💟BEBELAN POSITIF
▶berfikir dalam bentuk gambaran.
▶gambar bentuk tingkah laku.
Otak kita akan hasilkan apa yg kita gambarkan.
Perkataan 'JANGAN' tak tergambar dalam otak.
Otak tak boleh gambarkan perkataan 'JANGAN'
Otak percaya sekiranya dilakukan berulang2.
4 PERKARA PERLU PROGRAM OTAK
1. Cadangkan
2. Unik
3. Berulang2.
4. Emotionally strong.
cth. bayangkan sebakul durian.
cuba jangan bayangkan sebakul durian
▶tentu nak bayang jugakkan sebakul durian tu.
iklan di tv contohnya mmg gunakan 4 perkara di atas.
cth.
1. Aimankan anak mak yg pandai. betul ke pandai (not important)
2. Unik kan.
3. Ulang cakap
4. Emosi - Aimankan anak mak yg baik ( walau dlm keadaan marah)
Beza bebelan +ve dan -ve
Bebelan -ve (IBU A)
1. Abang kenapa bersepah baju.
2. Abg dah pukul brp ni masih lepak lagi.
Bebelan +ve (IBU B)
1. Abg baju masukkan dalam bakul, please.
2. Abg masuk mandi, lepas ni nak solat.
Generasi sekarang
Dapat habuan dulu cth ipad tp makesure solat, homework siap.
Generasi dulu
buat dulu smpi siap baru dapat habuan.
Tuesday, August 9, 2016
Power Parenting: Parenting Tanpa Stress - A review pt 2
PARENTING TANPA STRES
Second Session: Prof. Dato Dr Muhaya
✅ Kita akan dapat apa yang kita niatkan.
✅ Sebelum buat apa-apa, perlu ada niat yang jelas.
✅ Sentiasa buat refleksi diri:
1) Fizikal
2) Mental
3) Spiritual
✅ Fokus untuk didik hati
✅ Jiwa kita yang tenang, anak-anak kita tenang.
✅ Anak adalah anugerah Allah yang diberi melalui kita.
✅ Amanah ibubapa untuk didik anak-anak menjadi:
1) Hamba Allah yang taat kepada Allah.
2) Khalifah (bagi kebaikan kepada manusia).
3) Buat apa-apa ikut syariat.
✅ Fokus dalam keluarga hanyalah:
1) Syurga
2) Neraka
3) Dosa
4) Pahala
✅ Tips 5-US
1) Niat mesti lurus
2) Ibadat mesti bagus
3) Hati mesti tulus
4) Usaha mesti telus
5) Taubat mesti terus
✅ Hanya orang yang cinta dunia akan stress. Orang kaya ialah orang yang rasa cukup (qanaah).
✅ Sentiasa zikrullah dalam hati (daripada duduk saja-saja tu).
✅ Perkataan dan perbuatan mempengaruhi tenaga kita (perkataan dan perbuatan baik=tenaga kuat, perbuatan dan perkataan negatif=tenaga lemah)
✅ Fokus on developing yourself (berjaya atau tidak bergantung kepada berapa banyak kita nak berubah)
✅ Formula: Peristiwa+Respon=Hasil Kehidupan (depend kepada how we respon kepada peristiwa yang berlaku).
✅ Untuk berubah, sebut 4 perkara:
1) Alhamdulillah saya gembira dan bersyukur
2) Apakah 1 fikiran negatif yang halang saya jadi baik?
3) Apakah tabiat negatif yang cegah saya jadi baik? Try to fight tabiat buruk
4) Apakah tindakan yang kita boleh buat untuk ubah tabiat negatif tersebut?
✅ Kalau anak tak dengar cakap kita, tanya diri kita. Kita dengar tak cakap anak-anak kita?
✅ Kita degil dengan Allah, anak-anak konfem degil dengan kita
✅ 3 peringkat didikan anak-anak:
1) 0-7 tahun: Give love. Bagi kasih sayang
2) 8-14 tahun: Disiplin
3) 15-21 tahun: Be friend
✅ Hargai anak kita
✅ Jika perkara negatif berlaku, taubat dulu. Mintak ampun dari Allah
✅ Ubah diri sendiri dulu. Untuk ubah apa yang kita dapat, ubah apa yang kita beri. Pernah bagi negatif, akan dpt negatif. Bagi yang baik, dapat yang baik-baik.
✅ KUALITI SOLAT menentukan KUALITI KEHIDUPAN
Nota: Sila share dan sebarkan. Semoga bermanfaat untuk semua.
Second Session: Prof. Dato Dr Muhaya
✅ Kita akan dapat apa yang kita niatkan.
✅ Sebelum buat apa-apa, perlu ada niat yang jelas.
✅ Sentiasa buat refleksi diri:
1) Fizikal
2) Mental
3) Spiritual
✅ Fokus untuk didik hati
✅ Jiwa kita yang tenang, anak-anak kita tenang.
✅ Anak adalah anugerah Allah yang diberi melalui kita.
✅ Amanah ibubapa untuk didik anak-anak menjadi:
1) Hamba Allah yang taat kepada Allah.
2) Khalifah (bagi kebaikan kepada manusia).
3) Buat apa-apa ikut syariat.
✅ Fokus dalam keluarga hanyalah:
1) Syurga
2) Neraka
3) Dosa
4) Pahala
✅ Tips 5-US
1) Niat mesti lurus
2) Ibadat mesti bagus
3) Hati mesti tulus
4) Usaha mesti telus
5) Taubat mesti terus
✅ Hanya orang yang cinta dunia akan stress. Orang kaya ialah orang yang rasa cukup (qanaah).
✅ Sentiasa zikrullah dalam hati (daripada duduk saja-saja tu).
✅ Perkataan dan perbuatan mempengaruhi tenaga kita (perkataan dan perbuatan baik=tenaga kuat, perbuatan dan perkataan negatif=tenaga lemah)
✅ Fokus on developing yourself (berjaya atau tidak bergantung kepada berapa banyak kita nak berubah)
✅ Formula: Peristiwa+Respon=Hasil Kehidupan (depend kepada how we respon kepada peristiwa yang berlaku).
✅ Untuk berubah, sebut 4 perkara:
1) Alhamdulillah saya gembira dan bersyukur
2) Apakah 1 fikiran negatif yang halang saya jadi baik?
3) Apakah tabiat negatif yang cegah saya jadi baik? Try to fight tabiat buruk
4) Apakah tindakan yang kita boleh buat untuk ubah tabiat negatif tersebut?
✅ Kalau anak tak dengar cakap kita, tanya diri kita. Kita dengar tak cakap anak-anak kita?
✅ Kita degil dengan Allah, anak-anak konfem degil dengan kita
✅ 3 peringkat didikan anak-anak:
1) 0-7 tahun: Give love. Bagi kasih sayang
2) 8-14 tahun: Disiplin
3) 15-21 tahun: Be friend
✅ Hargai anak kita
✅ Jika perkara negatif berlaku, taubat dulu. Mintak ampun dari Allah
✅ Ubah diri sendiri dulu. Untuk ubah apa yang kita dapat, ubah apa yang kita beri. Pernah bagi negatif, akan dpt negatif. Bagi yang baik, dapat yang baik-baik.
✅ KUALITI SOLAT menentukan KUALITI KEHIDUPAN
Nota: Sila share dan sebarkan. Semoga bermanfaat untuk semua.
Monday, August 8, 2016
Power Parenting: Paradigma ibu bapa positif - A review pt 1
Catching up with my blog, so anyway, couple of weeks ago Love and I attended a talk called "Power Parenting". It's an 8 to 5pm event, RM120 per pax with talks from 5 icons:
1) Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah
2) Prof. Dr. Muhaya
3) Dr. Tengku Asmadi
4) Fadzli Yusof
5) Ustazah Isfadiah
It was my first to Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah's talk, and he quickly became my favourite! Not only due to his contents but also presentation. So many things I've learned from him. Here are some notes, taken during the talk but not by me, but by my friends in the session.
I guess, since they already typed them nicely, might as well just optimize them kan? I asked for their permission beforehand by the way, so no worries. Semoga mereka mendapat pahala berpanjangan.
Oh btw, if you would like to ask me whether you should go or not, I would REALLY HIGHLY recommend this talk as it will be one of your best investment, trust me!
PARADIGMA IBU BAPA POSITIF
First Session: Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah
✅ Don't ever claim "I am ok/aku dah ok" sebab: manusia mula jadi jahat bila dia rasa dia baik.
✅ Untuk sebarang perubahan: kene byk bersyukur sebab sgt ramai org tak bersyukur.
✅ Tanda-tanda org yg bersyukur:
1) Patuh perintah Allah
2) Lakukan setiap perkara dgn terbaik (always do the best in everything you do)
3) Bantu org tanpa syarat
4) Doakan org lain (org yg doakan org lain tanpa org itu ketahui, malaikat akan aminkan doanya dan doakan mende yg sama utk dirinya)
5) Maafkan org lain
✅ Asas utama: buat baik kepada kedua ibu bapamu supaya anak-anak mu berbuat baik kepada mu.
✅ Do good things no matter what.
✅ Rutin harian parents sebagai "inspirer": memberi inspirasi & contoh yg baik kepada anak-anak (ransang anak-anak & bagi penjelasan).
✅ Before do anything, DOA. (Apa yang mak ayah ckp itu DOA. Apa yang mak ayah fikir itu DOA. Maka, cakap & fikir yang baik-baik sahaja).
✅ Nak ubah orang lain, ubah diri sendiri dulu.
✅ 40 hari tak masuk dalam majlis ilmu, hati jadi gelap (majlis ilmu nowadays dah luas & senang didapati. Cth tengok majlis ilmu di tv @ internet).
✅ Manusia ditegur oleh Allah melalui manusia lain. Jadi, jangan marah/kecil hati bila ditegur. Jangan kecil hati walaupun cara menegur itu kurang hikmah.
✅ Kenal diri (siapa kenal diri, dia kenal Tuhannya).
✅ Mak ayah jangan marah-marah waktu pagi. Boleh menjejaskan emosi anak sepanjang hari.
✅ Kenapa mak bapak baik-baik, tapi anak jahat/tak dengar kata?
1) duit/rezeki TAK berkat (zakat tak dikeluarkan dengan sempurna. Zakat pendapatan tak setel. Ramai org terlepas pandang zakat emas dan perak)
✅ Kenapa mak bapak tak hebat mana dari segi pendidikan dan lain-lain tapi dapat anak yang baik-baik/pandai etc?
1) Amalan mak bapak itu sendiri (sentiasa doakan yang baik-baik kepada anak-anak & selalu mengaji quran) : sebab doa mak bapak mustajab
✅ Menurut kajian, anak yang nakal semasa kecil akan jadi orang dewasa yang bijaksana.
✅ Allah temukan yang terbaik untuk kita. Apa yang Allah bagi tak pernah silap (cth: jodoh).
✅ Kenal diri,
1) Kelebihan (gilap dan guna kelebihan yang ada pada diri kita untuk berjaya)
2) Kelemahan diri (atasi kelemahan diri untuk tujuan memperbaiki diri).
✅ Jangan risau anak tak dengar cakap kita, risaulah yang anak tengok diri kita (sebab anak akan tiru apa yg dia nampak).
✅ Rutin mak ayah yang cemerlang:
1) Solat wajib 5 waktu diawal waktu, solat-solat sunat tak tinggal terutama witir (setiap malam, bkn ramadhan sahaja), solat sunat taubat sebelom tido (jangan tido sebelom solat taubat).
2) Istighfar 70x setiap hari
3) Suami isteri memaafkan sebelom tido
4) Murnikan hati dengan sentiasa zikir, istighfar & solat taubat (semua ni membuka pintu rezeki)
5) Maafkan semua org sebelom tido
6) Tido mengiring ke kanan, baca doa & 3 Qul (kalau kita buat ni sebelom tido, setiap saat kita tido dapat pahala)
✅ GAMBAR YANG JELAS ITU ADALAH DOA YANG PALING MAKBUL
✅ Cara belajar yang betol:
1) duduk di kerusi/meja study
2) mengadap kiblat
3) Baca doa & surah Al Insyirah
4) Sebelom belajar, doakan guru-guru
✅ Setiap arahan pada anak, perlu ada gambaran.
1) Contoh arahan yg SALAH : Makan elok-elok (tiada gambaran disini macam mana cara nak makan elok-elok & anak tak bole proses arahan tu sebab dia pon tak tau macam mana nak makan elok-elok)
2) Contoh arahan yang BETUL: Irsyad, Amna.. Nak makan duduk, pastu baca doa makan & makan pakai tangan kanan ye.. (Dari sini anak dapat gambarkan macam mana cara nak terima arahan sebab gambaran yang diberikan oleh mak ayah nya jelas).
✅ Cara didik anak lelaki: guna logik & terangkan kenapa boleh kenapa tak boleh
✅ Cara didik anak perempuan: guna emosi ( kasih sayang & pujian. Puji untuk tingkatkan aura positif anak.
✅ Bentuk matlamat yang JELAS dan bentuk MISI dalam keluarga (contoh: ayah nak anak ayah jaga solat diawal waktu & baca quran lepas solat.
✅ Anak-anak kita SEMUANYA hebat tetapi berbeza-beza.
✅ Waktu maghrib, jangan benarkan anak keluar rumah melepasi waktu Maghrib (pesan Nabi untuk kita berada didalam rumah diwaktu Maghrib).
✅ Baca quran (rumah yang dibaca kan al Quran didalamnya Allah bagi rahmat).
✅ Dalam rumahtangga kita, HARAMKAN perkataan Negatif.
✅ Ibu bapa berubah dulu sebelom nak ubah anak-anak.
✅ Sentiasa ingatkan anak-anak tentang ibadah.
✅ Sebelom masuk rumah:
1) Baca Bismillah+ Surah Al Ikhlas+ salam = orang-orang dalam rumah & jiran =kaya (Hadis Sahih).
✅ Cara nak cari hidayah & rahmat Allah: terima tetamu dengan ikhlas kerana tetamu membawa masuk 1000 hidayah & membawa balik 1000 maghfirah.
✅ Parents please: No gadget at home. Gadget adalah untuk merapatkan yang jauh. Jangan kerana gadget ia menjauhkan yang dekat. Pukul 9-11pm no gadget. Simpan dalam almari.
✅ Waktu yang paling jitu untuk nasihatkan anak-anak:
1) Sebelom tido
2) Nasihat semasa tido: luarbiasa hebat
3) 30 saat baru bangun tido
4) Selepas mandi (gelombang Alfa dikeluarkan oleh tubuh anak memberikan ketenangan kepada anak)
5) Selepas solat
6) Selepas mengaji quran
7) Selepas didoakan anak dengan (Al Fatihah, Ayat Kursi, Al Insyirah, Ayat 1-5 Surat Toha, surah Al Hasyr (lau anzalna hazal quran..)
✅ Jangan lupa bangun pagi doa "Allahumma inni asaluka ilman nafia wa rizqan toyyiba wa amalan mutaqobbala"
✅ Selalu baca doa elak malas dan sifat negative
✅ Sentiasa baca Bismillah 5 untuk perlindungan diri
Nota: Sila sebarkan ilmu ini. Semoga bermanfaat.
1) Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah
2) Prof. Dr. Muhaya
3) Dr. Tengku Asmadi
4) Fadzli Yusof
5) Ustazah Isfadiah
It was my first to Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah's talk, and he quickly became my favourite! Not only due to his contents but also presentation. So many things I've learned from him. Here are some notes, taken during the talk but not by me, but by my friends in the session.
I guess, since they already typed them nicely, might as well just optimize them kan? I asked for their permission beforehand by the way, so no worries. Semoga mereka mendapat pahala berpanjangan.
Oh btw, if you would like to ask me whether you should go or not, I would REALLY HIGHLY recommend this talk as it will be one of your best investment, trust me!
PARADIGMA IBU BAPA POSITIF
First Session: Dato' Dr. Fadzilah Kamsah
✅ Don't ever claim "I am ok/aku dah ok" sebab: manusia mula jadi jahat bila dia rasa dia baik.
✅ Untuk sebarang perubahan: kene byk bersyukur sebab sgt ramai org tak bersyukur.
✅ Tanda-tanda org yg bersyukur:
1) Patuh perintah Allah
2) Lakukan setiap perkara dgn terbaik (always do the best in everything you do)
3) Bantu org tanpa syarat
4) Doakan org lain (org yg doakan org lain tanpa org itu ketahui, malaikat akan aminkan doanya dan doakan mende yg sama utk dirinya)
5) Maafkan org lain
✅ Asas utama: buat baik kepada kedua ibu bapamu supaya anak-anak mu berbuat baik kepada mu.
✅ Do good things no matter what.
✅ Rutin harian parents sebagai "inspirer": memberi inspirasi & contoh yg baik kepada anak-anak (ransang anak-anak & bagi penjelasan).
✅ Before do anything, DOA. (Apa yang mak ayah ckp itu DOA. Apa yang mak ayah fikir itu DOA. Maka, cakap & fikir yang baik-baik sahaja).
✅ Nak ubah orang lain, ubah diri sendiri dulu.
✅ 40 hari tak masuk dalam majlis ilmu, hati jadi gelap (majlis ilmu nowadays dah luas & senang didapati. Cth tengok majlis ilmu di tv @ internet).
✅ Manusia ditegur oleh Allah melalui manusia lain. Jadi, jangan marah/kecil hati bila ditegur. Jangan kecil hati walaupun cara menegur itu kurang hikmah.
✅ Kenal diri (siapa kenal diri, dia kenal Tuhannya).
✅ Mak ayah jangan marah-marah waktu pagi. Boleh menjejaskan emosi anak sepanjang hari.
✅ Kenapa mak bapak baik-baik, tapi anak jahat/tak dengar kata?
1) duit/rezeki TAK berkat (zakat tak dikeluarkan dengan sempurna. Zakat pendapatan tak setel. Ramai org terlepas pandang zakat emas dan perak)
✅ Kenapa mak bapak tak hebat mana dari segi pendidikan dan lain-lain tapi dapat anak yang baik-baik/pandai etc?
1) Amalan mak bapak itu sendiri (sentiasa doakan yang baik-baik kepada anak-anak & selalu mengaji quran) : sebab doa mak bapak mustajab
✅ Menurut kajian, anak yang nakal semasa kecil akan jadi orang dewasa yang bijaksana.
✅ Allah temukan yang terbaik untuk kita. Apa yang Allah bagi tak pernah silap (cth: jodoh).
✅ Kenal diri,
1) Kelebihan (gilap dan guna kelebihan yang ada pada diri kita untuk berjaya)
2) Kelemahan diri (atasi kelemahan diri untuk tujuan memperbaiki diri).
✅ Jangan risau anak tak dengar cakap kita, risaulah yang anak tengok diri kita (sebab anak akan tiru apa yg dia nampak).
✅ Rutin mak ayah yang cemerlang:
1) Solat wajib 5 waktu diawal waktu, solat-solat sunat tak tinggal terutama witir (setiap malam, bkn ramadhan sahaja), solat sunat taubat sebelom tido (jangan tido sebelom solat taubat).
2) Istighfar 70x setiap hari
3) Suami isteri memaafkan sebelom tido
4) Murnikan hati dengan sentiasa zikir, istighfar & solat taubat (semua ni membuka pintu rezeki)
5) Maafkan semua org sebelom tido
6) Tido mengiring ke kanan, baca doa & 3 Qul (kalau kita buat ni sebelom tido, setiap saat kita tido dapat pahala)
✅ GAMBAR YANG JELAS ITU ADALAH DOA YANG PALING MAKBUL
✅ Cara belajar yang betol:
1) duduk di kerusi/meja study
2) mengadap kiblat
3) Baca doa & surah Al Insyirah
4) Sebelom belajar, doakan guru-guru
✅ Setiap arahan pada anak, perlu ada gambaran.
1) Contoh arahan yg SALAH : Makan elok-elok (tiada gambaran disini macam mana cara nak makan elok-elok & anak tak bole proses arahan tu sebab dia pon tak tau macam mana nak makan elok-elok)
2) Contoh arahan yang BETUL: Irsyad, Amna.. Nak makan duduk, pastu baca doa makan & makan pakai tangan kanan ye.. (Dari sini anak dapat gambarkan macam mana cara nak terima arahan sebab gambaran yang diberikan oleh mak ayah nya jelas).
✅ Cara didik anak lelaki: guna logik & terangkan kenapa boleh kenapa tak boleh
✅ Cara didik anak perempuan: guna emosi ( kasih sayang & pujian. Puji untuk tingkatkan aura positif anak.
✅ Bentuk matlamat yang JELAS dan bentuk MISI dalam keluarga (contoh: ayah nak anak ayah jaga solat diawal waktu & baca quran lepas solat.
✅ Anak-anak kita SEMUANYA hebat tetapi berbeza-beza.
✅ Waktu maghrib, jangan benarkan anak keluar rumah melepasi waktu Maghrib (pesan Nabi untuk kita berada didalam rumah diwaktu Maghrib).
✅ Baca quran (rumah yang dibaca kan al Quran didalamnya Allah bagi rahmat).
✅ Dalam rumahtangga kita, HARAMKAN perkataan Negatif.
✅ Ibu bapa berubah dulu sebelom nak ubah anak-anak.
✅ Sentiasa ingatkan anak-anak tentang ibadah.
✅ Sebelom masuk rumah:
1) Baca Bismillah+ Surah Al Ikhlas+ salam = orang-orang dalam rumah & jiran =kaya (Hadis Sahih).
✅ Cara nak cari hidayah & rahmat Allah: terima tetamu dengan ikhlas kerana tetamu membawa masuk 1000 hidayah & membawa balik 1000 maghfirah.
✅ Parents please: No gadget at home. Gadget adalah untuk merapatkan yang jauh. Jangan kerana gadget ia menjauhkan yang dekat. Pukul 9-11pm no gadget. Simpan dalam almari.
✅ Waktu yang paling jitu untuk nasihatkan anak-anak:
1) Sebelom tido
2) Nasihat semasa tido: luarbiasa hebat
3) 30 saat baru bangun tido
4) Selepas mandi (gelombang Alfa dikeluarkan oleh tubuh anak memberikan ketenangan kepada anak)
5) Selepas solat
6) Selepas mengaji quran
7) Selepas didoakan anak dengan (Al Fatihah, Ayat Kursi, Al Insyirah, Ayat 1-5 Surat Toha, surah Al Hasyr (lau anzalna hazal quran..)
✅ Jangan lupa bangun pagi doa "Allahumma inni asaluka ilman nafia wa rizqan toyyiba wa amalan mutaqobbala"
✅ Selalu baca doa elak malas dan sifat negative
✅ Sentiasa baca Bismillah 5 untuk perlindungan diri
Nota: Sila sebarkan ilmu ini. Semoga bermanfaat.
Wednesday, July 27, 2016
How He reminds me: My aftermath umrah story
Right after I arrived in Malaysia from Makkah, I missed the holy land so badly, I cried sometimes so horribly I almost couldn't breathe one time.
Then a month after, I received somewhat like an offer as a postdoc in a university in Jeddah, an hour away from Makkah, in an exact field I'm majoring right now, with triple the pay than what I received in my current university.
Was I excited? Not a word could describe it, and my supportive husband willing to let go his current job.
But, looking at my parents, I didn't have the heart. I came from a very conservative family in that sense, my mom never left us anywhere overnight. When I stayed in uni, my parents called me every night, seriously I promise, every night. And none of us have ever been away to boarding school or anything.
I couldn't imagine them being away from my girls.
Then, my husband got promoted and that was it. I knew I had to let it go, although husband insisted. He is at the peak of his career, and after all the provider of the family, thinking of prioritizing mine over him just kills me inside.
"Let's go again end of this year!" Love suggested, without the kids this time around.
Not now. Not when Aisha is still cranky having to sleep without me. Recently, I had to work outstation and she slept at 2am after crying inconsolably, poor mom.
When I missed Makkah, I looked at the images in Google Map. The drone and 360 images help a lot.
A couple of days ago, I received a message.
An invitation.
To that particular university, may I remind you just an hour away from Masjidil Haraam.
On October, right after Hajj where you can only enter Makkah by invitation during that time. Imagine how empty Masjidil Haraam would be, not empty but you know what I mean..
Anddddd... the best part, I would be given business visa + umrah.
"Can I bring my spouse?" Was my first question. No need to think, this is Almighty's invitation ro me.
"No, because this is by invitation," was the reply I got. Sure would shatter by hub's heart, but I still want to go.
"How about my mahram, then?" I asked. "For umrah, how about my mahram?"
Anddddd... stuck. Now, I'm stuck with the mahram issue. Make lots of doa if this is meant for me, Allah swt would make everything easy for me.
Even if it's not meant for me this time around, He constantly reminds me of Makkah, masha Allah terharunya. *cries*
Then a month after, I received somewhat like an offer as a postdoc in a university in Jeddah, an hour away from Makkah, in an exact field I'm majoring right now, with triple the pay than what I received in my current university.
Was I excited? Not a word could describe it, and my supportive husband willing to let go his current job.
But, looking at my parents, I didn't have the heart. I came from a very conservative family in that sense, my mom never left us anywhere overnight. When I stayed in uni, my parents called me every night, seriously I promise, every night. And none of us have ever been away to boarding school or anything.
I couldn't imagine them being away from my girls.
Then, my husband got promoted and that was it. I knew I had to let it go, although husband insisted. He is at the peak of his career, and after all the provider of the family, thinking of prioritizing mine over him just kills me inside.
"Let's go again end of this year!" Love suggested, without the kids this time around.
Not now. Not when Aisha is still cranky having to sleep without me. Recently, I had to work outstation and she slept at 2am after crying inconsolably, poor mom.
 |
| Where my heart belongs :) |
When I missed Makkah, I looked at the images in Google Map. The drone and 360 images help a lot.
A couple of days ago, I received a message.
An invitation.
To that particular university, may I remind you just an hour away from Masjidil Haraam.
On October, right after Hajj where you can only enter Makkah by invitation during that time. Imagine how empty Masjidil Haraam would be, not empty but you know what I mean..
Anddddd... the best part, I would be given business visa + umrah.
"Can I bring my spouse?" Was my first question. No need to think, this is Almighty's invitation ro me.
"No, because this is by invitation," was the reply I got. Sure would shatter by hub's heart, but I still want to go.
"How about my mahram, then?" I asked. "For umrah, how about my mahram?"
Anddddd... stuck. Now, I'm stuck with the mahram issue. Make lots of doa if this is meant for me, Allah swt would make everything easy for me.
Even if it's not meant for me this time around, He constantly reminds me of Makkah, masha Allah terharunya. *cries*
Monday, July 18, 2016
The kids' supporter
Now that Khaira all grown up, she made friends easily. Especially during Raya; mostly she could really click, but not always.
Aisha, well she would be minding her own business most of the time. That includes running and jumping non-stop, Mashaa Allah. I just kept on telling myself that sweating is good for her immune system, or else I'd go crazy.
As for Khaira, she lovesss to bring her toys everywhere. When I said toys; read: stones that she picked up outside my grandmother's house mcm tak pernah jumpa batu, extra straws she requested from kakak jual air kelapa mcm I tak belikan dia actual toys or even.. "kemuncup" (T_T) Her favourite somehow.
Ironically, these things are the ones that caused arguments between the kids her age. These kids also want that exact stone/straw/kemuncup, I couldn't even brain guys.
Previously, I asked her to share.
Then, my mom said something that impacted me greatly. I rarely share stuff with anybody in my life. Had my own toys, own room, my own car, my own everything.
And here, I'm asking my girls to share.
My mom's reasoning is simple: so that each of us have a sense of belonging and to know that "NO" is a perfectly legitimate answer.
So, I tried to balance things out, but I don't quite sure how to do it. I guess when Khaira was playing with that something and other kids took that thing from her, I'd just observe for Khaira to fight for her stuff back so it won't get worse.. Else, I'd just ask her to lend it to her friends.
As of now, it works fine for me so I'm just gonna stick with the rules.
Plus I read something recently and realizing that, made me somehow a lot calmer.
Also worth sharing that, Maznah from www.maznahibrahim.com shared something with me recently that I thought worth sharing with all of us, mommies..
"Namun bahan penebat non material paling MAHAL, UTAMA dan PERCUMA, ialah diri Mak ayah sndiri. Kita adalah penebat emosi terbaik utk anak-anak rasa selesa ;) Maka, jadilah diri kita sendiri, seperti mahunya Allah untuk kita jadi Ibubapa Yang Baik, bukan Mahunya Masyarakat yang sesekali jumpa. Bersederhana. (anak jumpa kita setiap hari, kita adalah sokongan dia. Untuk kita, Allah 365-24-7-60 dengan kita, Allah bantu kita atau penebat kita)."
Aisha, well she would be minding her own business most of the time. That includes running and jumping non-stop, Mashaa Allah. I just kept on telling myself that sweating is good for her immune system, or else I'd go crazy.
As for Khaira, she lovesss to bring her toys everywhere. When I said toys; read: stones that she picked up outside my grandmother's house mcm tak pernah jumpa batu, extra straws she requested from kakak jual air kelapa mcm I tak belikan dia actual toys or even.. "kemuncup" (T_T) Her favourite somehow.
Ironically, these things are the ones that caused arguments between the kids her age. These kids also want that exact stone/straw/kemuncup, I couldn't even brain guys.
 |
| Back at my kampung in Bukit Melawati, Kuala Selangor. |
Previously, I asked her to share.
Then, my mom said something that impacted me greatly. I rarely share stuff with anybody in my life. Had my own toys, own room, my own car, my own everything.
And here, I'm asking my girls to share.
My mom's reasoning is simple: so that each of us have a sense of belonging and to know that "NO" is a perfectly legitimate answer.
So, I tried to balance things out, but I don't quite sure how to do it. I guess when Khaira was playing with that something and other kids took that thing from her, I'd just observe for Khaira to fight for her stuff back so it won't get worse.. Else, I'd just ask her to lend it to her friends.
As of now, it works fine for me so I'm just gonna stick with the rules.
Plus I read something recently and realizing that, made me somehow a lot calmer.
Also worth sharing that, Maznah from www.maznahibrahim.com shared something with me recently that I thought worth sharing with all of us, mommies..
"Namun bahan penebat non material paling MAHAL, UTAMA dan PERCUMA, ialah diri Mak ayah sndiri. Kita adalah penebat emosi terbaik utk anak-anak rasa selesa ;) Maka, jadilah diri kita sendiri, seperti mahunya Allah untuk kita jadi Ibubapa Yang Baik, bukan Mahunya Masyarakat yang sesekali jumpa. Bersederhana. (anak jumpa kita setiap hari, kita adalah sokongan dia. Untuk kita, Allah 365-24-7-60 dengan kita, Allah bantu kita atau penebat kita)."
Have a wonderful Raya entertaining your little ones, your amanah everyone! :)
Monday, July 11, 2016
A wise man on a raya night
My Raya morning started off gloomy.
Then, I realized.. Alhamdulillah.. both my girls are healthy, so do my hubs and both our families. I am grateful for everything.
Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitry everyone. May Allah SWT accept our fast, prayers and all our ibadah. Please do forgive me for all my wrong doings, whether intentionally or unintentionally.
This year was my first to spend my first raya at my parents'. Normally would be in in-laws' (Ampang) the whole raya week since most of my aunts and uncles would be away, so I would just stay near late Grandmom's place at Kg Pandan just in case.
Also, this year was my first sleep over at Kuala Selangor, my other late Grandmom's house since I basically have nobody to take care of in Kg Pandan anymore.
Wouldn't it just last year you called me up, Mak, when I was in Kuala Selangor, asking if I would come back for the night, a reassurance that we will always be there for you?
Ahhh.. where do I in turn get the reassurance this year.. I miss you Mak.
Sad stories aside, I met a wonderful man that Raya night. One worth sharing with my readers.
13 years ago, an MD of Perodua made friend with my husband whom was working at O'Briens Cafe after SPM. He obviously did not have to, but being humble as he sincerely is, he did anyway (I'm far from MD, I wonder if I ever make friends with a waiter who serves me). And they remained very good friend ever since.
Well, he's retired now, after being a COO at Naza Kia. And he lives our dream life definitely. Now he rents an apartment in Tokyo; his most favorite city and would be back and forth from KL to Tokyo. You can tell that he's having one wonderful family around him. A very humble house and cars. A dream life, simply to put it.
Sometimes, when Love and I were so hectic with our work to earn a decent income for our family, we seldom asked ourselves, when will this stop? Both of us always try our best to be the best in everything, we have achieved so much so young but with one downside of course, we always need more time with the girls, with each other.
I mean, we saw one Datuk at 50 still needs to work to sustain his lifestyle, when will this end? Bigger income, but bigger house, bigger cars, and endless work like this still?
"One day, I gave an Omega watch to every employee I have in Perodua," the man in the picture with Love told us that night. "Everybody was happy.."
Of course, they should.
"Until they found out I gave one person a Rolex," this man answered our question so wisely as he already is.
We smiled. Such a strong analogy, this one :)
Dream family, dream life. Soon, inshaa Allah.
May Allah SWT grants us happiness always with whatever that we already have. May we have a humble life in shaa Allah.
Then, I realized.. Alhamdulillah.. both my girls are healthy, so do my hubs and both our families. I am grateful for everything.
Selamat Hari Raya Aidilfitry everyone. May Allah SWT accept our fast, prayers and all our ibadah. Please do forgive me for all my wrong doings, whether intentionally or unintentionally.
This year was my first to spend my first raya at my parents'. Normally would be in in-laws' (Ampang) the whole raya week since most of my aunts and uncles would be away, so I would just stay near late Grandmom's place at Kg Pandan just in case.
Also, this year was my first sleep over at Kuala Selangor, my other late Grandmom's house since I basically have nobody to take care of in Kg Pandan anymore.
Wouldn't it just last year you called me up, Mak, when I was in Kuala Selangor, asking if I would come back for the night, a reassurance that we will always be there for you?
Ahhh.. where do I in turn get the reassurance this year.. I miss you Mak.
Sad stories aside, I met a wonderful man that Raya night. One worth sharing with my readers.
13 years ago, an MD of Perodua made friend with my husband whom was working at O'Briens Cafe after SPM. He obviously did not have to, but being humble as he sincerely is, he did anyway (I'm far from MD, I wonder if I ever make friends with a waiter who serves me). And they remained very good friend ever since.
Well, he's retired now, after being a COO at Naza Kia. And he lives our dream life definitely. Now he rents an apartment in Tokyo; his most favorite city and would be back and forth from KL to Tokyo. You can tell that he's having one wonderful family around him. A very humble house and cars. A dream life, simply to put it.
Sometimes, when Love and I were so hectic with our work to earn a decent income for our family, we seldom asked ourselves, when will this stop? Both of us always try our best to be the best in everything, we have achieved so much so young but with one downside of course, we always need more time with the girls, with each other.
I mean, we saw one Datuk at 50 still needs to work to sustain his lifestyle, when will this end? Bigger income, but bigger house, bigger cars, and endless work like this still?
"One day, I gave an Omega watch to every employee I have in Perodua," the man in the picture with Love told us that night. "Everybody was happy.."
Of course, they should.
"Until they found out I gave one person a Rolex," this man answered our question so wisely as he already is.
We smiled. Such a strong analogy, this one :)
Dream family, dream life. Soon, inshaa Allah.
May Allah SWT grants us happiness always with whatever that we already have. May we have a humble life in shaa Allah.
Wednesday, June 29, 2016
Fragile
I broke down before my class this morning.
And after.
Then, I pissed off with everything.
I should have bought a flight ticket and fly somewhere far away for Raya. To make it worst, it will be such a long holiday break this time around.
I barely made it to Ramadhan without my Grandmom, and God knows how I'm gonna get through it for Raya.
Raya songs have never annoyed me this much, I have managed to get away from them all the time so far.
I haven't fully open myself up about Grandmom to anyone since she passed away, not even to husband as it makes me feel so fragile.
Maybe talking about it makes it feel so surreal? I don't know.
All I know is that, I really REALLY need to get away from here for Raya.
Back to square one, I'm regressing. Started to think if I'll ever move on :(
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