Wednesday, October 19, 2011

The (hypno)birth of Khaira Asyikin

Little Khaira's EDD was on the 30th October 2011, but I had a feeling she would come out to this world a little earlier. I predicted she would come out on the 14th, Love predicted on the 16th.

But after our weekly check up on the 13th, doctor said baby had not yet engaged, it would take more than a week, I got disappointed. I could not wait to see our baby, so I did almost everything to get Little Khaira engaged. Squat, walk for 3kms, bouncing on gym ball, you name it..

So a day before the delivery, I took a slow walk along Taman TAR, about 3kms. I attended Baby Zara's aqiqah and Uniten's convo. At night, I felt some mild and yet a new sensation during my surge. I urinate even more frequently that night, almost once every 2 hours.

At 3am on 17th October, I went for a pee and already had a blood show. I woke Love up for second opinion, wore a pad and the blood show continued until we woke up at 6am. I asked Love, "Should we go to work today?"

Love asked, "Do you think Khaira will come out today?"

I said, "If you asked me, I think yes, she's ready to come out today."

So we decided to take a leave, mild surge like period pain came every now and then, surges were not yet regular, we could not even time them yet. Had a heavy breakfast and lunch because I felt REALLY hungry that day. Nesting instinct?

Love was really sick on that day, he had a throat infection that already infected his tummy. Went to a clinic to get his MC. I got a bit worried by then.

During lunch at 2pm (by this time Mum and Dad kept asking me to go to the hospital), the surge started to get regular. Around 5 minutes apart and each surge lasted for about 40seconds. I decided to stay at home as long as possible, so I took my gym ball and bouncing up and down until the surge got more frequent.

Then the surge started to get as long as 2 minutes for 2 more minutes apart. We packed our stuff and decided to take a slow drive to the hospital at about 3pm. Love stopped by a stall to get me some fresh coconut to keep my amniotic fluid sufficient so Little Khaira will be comfortable inside. So thoughtful.

As we arrived to the hospital at 4.30pm, waited for admission, the surge got stronger. I went inside the labor room at 5pm, midwife did the VE and I was sooo disappointed to know that I was only 3cms dilated by then. 3cms? How could that be possible. I thought I would at least be 7cms dilated by then. I was expected to deliver the next morning, argh!!

Midwife asked me whether I wanted to go home, or I wanted to be admitted, I said I wanted to be admitted to the ward because I had a feeling I was gonna birth at a near time.

Then after the 20minutes of annoying EFM where I couldn't move an inch to adjust my position so that surge would have less sensation, a doctor came to do the VE again. A new doctor, apparently our gynae was on leave. :( So all the birth plan that we were working for, sigh..

Anyway, it was about half an hour after the first VE, and I was already 6cms dilated! Theoretically, you'll be dilated 1 cm every hour. Alhamdulillah, theory is just a theory after all. So they said they expected me to give birth at 9pm today, I was already in labour, I had to stay inside the labour room.

I resisted all the pain relief. No epidural, no injections, no laughing gas, etc.

The pain which was then bearable, became way full of sensation at that time. Almost no gap in between. My source of strength is next beside me, Love was there throughout the delivery and he was everything and more than I could asked for. Alhamdulillah. I am so blessed. He helped me in ways even a healthy person would not be able to help. May Allah SWT bless you, Sayang.

Tried to bear, but at about 6.40pm, I felt a really strong sensation to breathe down. I asked Love to call the nurse. Midwife came and I asked her to check on me, she put on her glove and just about when she wanted to do the VE, I saw her reaction; surprised and started caling the doctors and the nurses.

"OMG. You were so quite!" The midwife said. Apparently, I was already fully dilated!!

With the first breath, baby's head already crowning. And at the fourth breath, Little Khaira was out to this world, not a single cry, eyes wide open at 6.55pm, 2.7kgs. Alhamdulillah :)

Love managed to capture the video of the birth, which I will upload in the near time. Don't worry, it's PG. You'll be surprised at how calm and how easy Little Khaira was born :) Thank you for all the prayers.


Video of the birth can be found here.

My birth story has been published in Hypnobirthing Malaysia's website. Read it here.

Monday, October 10, 2011

Raya 2011 :)

Raya has been super fun for me.. Alhamdulillah, once again I had the chance to meet my 'life'..

And we have a new addition in my in law's family this year..

Kak Izrin! Missing in the pic, sister-in-law currently in Korea. But, she called me that Raya eve, so.. tadelaa sedih sangat.

Went to quite a lot of open houses this year. Among the most interesting one is Esan's open house. We were in the same Mandarin class back then, and we were HUGE fans of Upin Ipin. Was excited for his open house to meet his adorable daughter, Zafreen!!!

Finally, got the chance to bring Love over to my uncle's house; who owns some sort of farm.

Happy to see that Love and my family / cousins are getting closer and closer each day. My little cousin, Danish was excited upon seeing Love's new Liverpool jersey, he changed to his jersey too..

I got the chance to meet my friends from all over the world this Raya. Rezeki pregnant mummy, everyone got to see my tummy.

I'm glad I had the chance to meet BFF Qdin who came back to Malaysia for a couple of days during Raya.

Met Fai who came all the way from Aberdeen.

Met Go San, Love's friend from Japan.

Met my soulmates..

Catch breakfast with FJoe, whose sister-in-law just gave birth inside her car!!Btw, my new favourite breakfast spot has got to be Subang Ria!

Met my relatives a lotttt!! :) Just last weekend mum threw a small kenduri doa selamat for my delivery. My younger brother threw a surprise by sponsoring a birthday cake for me; a yummy carrot cake!

Aaahhhhh.. I miss Raya already. Raya haji tak besh! I'll be in confinement, tak dapat makan rendang, bwekk!!

Just so you know, I ate A LOT throughout Raya, from the first week of Raya until now, I gained consistently 1 kg each week.. Gemokkkk!!! So, if you're wondering how much I gained as of now, it's 12 kgs altogether ok. Benci. Maximum I can gain is 12 kgs. Dah max out!!!! Tamau makan Obimin lagi, gemokkk!!!

Wednesday, October 5, 2011

The things he did for us

Little Princess,

I just want you to know about some of the things Daddy sacrificed for us, even way before you were born..

1) During my morning sickness, he would bath me, feed me, massaged me, cleaned me up eveytime I vomited.

2) He went to Hypnobirthing class with me, minding the distance and the fees.

3) He was with me in EVERY monthly (and now weekly) check up; just to get a glance of you. And today, with the new gynae, we finally had the chance to see your face, and your tiny little fingers and toes. May Allah SWT bless our gynae.

4) He came up with brilliant brilliant slides of hypnobirthing for me to refer to.

5) He would monitor my foods, my drinks, what I should and should not eat. And Alhamdulillah, I am as healthy as a horse now.

6) He prayed for us everytime after prayers.

7) He cancelled a 12 hours concert (which ticket he already bought) that he so wanted to go, just for us.

8) He put his dream Alfa on hold, just for us.

9) He fight for the natural birth that I wanted.

10) And most importantly, he supports us both physically and mentally.

You're safe around him, Little Princess. WE are safe around him. He has so much love to provide us. Just when I thought he gave us enough, there are more and more love coming from him.

I can't thank you enough, Sayang. It's one of the many many days I feel so blessed having you as my husband, and most importantly having you as a father of our Little Princess :) 143.

Our new gynae :)


Introducing our new gynae..

Dr. Khamsiah Muda from An-Nur. She signed our birth plan, yay!!!

What a happy happy day knowing Little Princess will be delivered by a Muslim female doctor at a Pusat Rawatan Islam.

Alhamdulillah, as I said I have faith Allah SWT will help us along the way.

The appointment this morning was fruitful, smooth sailing, exciting, and calming. Dr. Khamsiah's direction is the same as us, to have as natural birth as possible.

I feel so blessed (T_T).

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

List of doctors that support hypnobirthing

I am in my 37 weeks of pregnancy, and after what took my previous gynae a month to study my birth plan, she rejected it without negotiation. How would you think it makes me feel?

I was crushed. I put a very high hope on her, I did not have any back up plan. My BIGGEST mistake.

So just a couple of weeks (or days maybe?) before my delivery, I felt as if I was at the end of the tunnel. Sad. Devastated.

Then I received a message from a friend of mine, Kdy, suggesting me to get the support from a gentle birthing group in facebook. I did so almost immediately, and asked them about my current situations and on what I should do.

The responses were overwhelming, I nearly cried. They were so supportive of my situations and it's calming to see that there are actually a lot of mothers that fight for their natural birth just the way I want mine to be.

You know how many times I got laughed at.. at the thought of having a homebirth. At the thought of resisting epidural. Even at the thought of having vaginal birth because of the size of my body. So. Not. Funny.

Anyways, here I am, sharing you the list of doctors that support natural birth in KL/Selangor area after being suggested by the very supportive mommies out there..

1) KPJ Damansara specialist - Dr. Maziah
2) An-Nur, Bangi - Dr. Khamsiah
3) Pantai Bangsar - Dr. Choong Kuo Hsiang, Dr. Wong Sum Keong
4) Gleneagles - Dr. Teresa Chow, Dr. Ravi, Dr. Jean Woo
5) Columbia Asia, Cheras - Dr. Haw
6) KPJ Seremban - Dr. Subramaniam
7) Sunway Medical - Dr. Wong Chin Yuan
8) Tropicana Medical Center - Dr. Dev Menon

Sedih.. satu orang je doktor Islam yang support natural birth? Sigh..

I'm currently fixing appointments to meet these mesmerizing gynaes. Pray for the best. And to everyone that helps me get through this hard time, may God bless you. They are all beyond repayment. THANK YOU.

I especially love this comment, "there is light at the end of the tunnel. when you want something so badly, the whole universe will conspire with you to achieve it, insyaAllah. so glad you found this group, asyikin. must just simply mean the universe is working with you to achieve the normal gentle birth for you and hub. :)"

Monday, October 3, 2011

The time I needed them most

No gossips.

No work related chats.

Just LOVE!

Thank you guys, such spontaneous plan (TQ Fiah!), but at the time I needed you guys the most.

Sunday, October 2, 2011


Dear Little Princess,

The moment I wrote you this letter, I was at the lowest point of my life since I have you in my tummy.

Our gynae finally made a decision about our birth plan.. She firmly rejected it without willing to negotiate even a little.

As you know Little Princess.. I want you to be born as natural as possible.. Now I even have the thought of birthing you at home with daddy. But, I'm not as courageous yet. So the best thing we can do, Little Princess, is to wait as long as possible at home. We must work together; you, me and daddy as a family.

Tell me when you're ready to see the world, then only we take a very slow drive to hospital ok.

If you decide it's best for you to birth in the car, daddy and I are totally ok with it. Whatever best for you. Whatever best for us, Dear God.

As for now, we have to be more connected k, tell me when you're ready.

We're doing this for a good cause Little Princess, Allah SWT will help us along the way. Just have faith.

IBW, with love.